Thursday night was busy

This dream started out with me in a police training room. I was there to assist in some training. The problem seem to be that the teacher was no where to be seen. So we all just talked about what the training was for and such. Then we all just talked. It was a lot of fun hanging out with them. After a while of this they gave me a ride to his house.

We pulled onto the road and I noticed a lot of Native Americans, dressed like they would be today. Most had long black hair pulled back. Not one of them acknowledge me being there. He parked in the street and said we have to walk up the driveway cause the car won't fit. I said fine but was looking at the driveway and it was like he others and there were cars in it. Up the driveway we went and the sky came closer to the ground. It was like an optical allusion of being enough room. I just kind of raised my eyebrows and thought it was interesting. When we got to the top of the drive way I found we were on a mountain. There was this beautiful land below us. A valley to be specific. Lots of trees all around it. I remember thinking wow I could have a horse here.

Then I was parking my car in a parking lot and got into the truck parked next to me. It had a lift kit on it like Matt's so it was really tall. He backed out and then a small white pick up truck backed out and drove toward the other side of my car. We couldn't see anyone driving. I kept looking and then thought maybe it rolled over there. Then my brain was saying no you saw it being steered into that place. Then I saw a childs head. I thought I cannot believe parents would let their kids drive around in a parking lot unattended. There were two children in the car though I could only see one. I turned my head and there was this baby standing right on the edge of the parking lot from a walk way. The mother was there in a flash. Now this baby was like a toddler but only the size of like an 8 month old. He had on the cutest outfit, all primary colors. Blue, red and yellow. He had no hair. The mother called out to the kids in the truck to be careful. We drove past the baby less than a foot. I was really nervous because I thought what if he falls or gets away from her. I wanted to tell the driver this but we were already past.

Again it changed to where we were at a stable. This time there were two men, a girl in a wheel chair, and me. One of the men was her dad, the other her psyciatrist. She was doing pretty well without help so I didn't want her to think I thought she wasn't capable of making her way and left her to move herself around. She got to one point where she was stuck so I grabbed the chair and helped her up a slight incline. She was laughing and having a good time so I continued pushing her. I knew when she was ready to do it herself she'd say something. It seemed like I let her roll down one hill and she had fun so we came to another hill and I turned loose of her and she swerved to the left and came to rest close to a wall. I ran down the hill and saw this hole that she had avoided. I apologized for not seeing it. She seemed upset and was holding something in her hands. I asked what it was and she said you broke the handle bars. I felt so bad and apologized again and then we were off to the barn.

So we were wondering around and went into one part of the barn and there were hundreds of people in there. I couldn't believe how many people were wandering around. They all turned to look at us. The first stall on the left had a stud in it. They flipped over his name sign and it said he was available 2005 for breeding. I thought that was a weird way to advertise but went on. This barn was huge and like a maze and so many people. We wondered around in this place and this lady came from somewhere. It was like she was in charge of this place. She announced that everyone should follow her into the other building. For some reason I knew it was a set time that people were all gathered. The 4 of us stayed in the barn. It was so much quieter. I looked around and there were 2 pieces of beaded art work on the floor. Bother were frame. One in a good frame and the other a cheap wobbly frame. They were of the same subject. I said outloud but to no one. "They have contest at this stable?" So I continued to look around and the other three were at the end of this aisle so I went to them. There was a table with some cookies and stuff on it. I guessed they were having some kind of party. My first thought was I didn't bring anything. Then these people came back in and sat down in the chairs that were all lined up in the center. They were all staring blank faced, ahead of them. This woman in charge showed up and again. On this table this was this really old woman. Her skin was so wrinkly, her hair white. I could smell her age. Just behind her was a little coffee shop that was empty. I kind of stood and hid there watching. All the people in the chairs were women. The woman in charge was programming this old woman. She would say something and the woman was suppose to respond a certain way. So I whispered in her ear a crass way of saying what they wanted her to say. It was pee in the woods. That's what I kept telling her. She could barely talk. For that fact she just made noises instead. There was another old woman, short, cute, wrinkly and so full of life encouraging this other old woman. Then they all left. I called to the doctor to come help this old woman. I was thinking they were trying to program her so he should be able to help. He didn't want to help her which upset me. He said he was here to help the girl in the wheelchair. I looked down that aisle and there she was sitting. Then she pushed herself up and she was the little baby I had seen.

Then I woke.

Where does your Beauty lie?

B:

Your Beauty lies
in Plain Sight. Plain, simple and the girl next
door. People tend overlook you as you are the
"normal girl", but you're actually
very beautiful. And you have plenty about you to
set you apart, but more that
lets you blend. People love the stability you have
because as others may come
and go, you will always be there and you may always
be the same. You like simple
things and that's what people like about you. You
most likely enjoy things most
consider normal, like movies, shopping, that sort
of thing and are very friendly
and probably have many friends. You are sweet and
kind and that shows on you,
but you're also strong and not very naive. You're a
rather well-rounded
individual. Even though some people pass you off as
just another girl, shrug it
off because they don't know what they're
missing.

Some Things
That Represent You:

Element:
Earth, Light Animal: Cat Color:
Pinks, Blues, Browns Song:
Girl Next Door by Pilot Expression: Simple
Smile

Gemstone:
Alexandrite Mythological Creature: Fox
Demon, Hobbit Planet: Jupiter Hair
Color: Light Brown Eye Color:
Brown

Quote:
"To the world you may be one person, but to
one person you may be the world."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla

That test was screwy

I took the test again... Well not really I used the same answers and it was different this time.



You come from the Middle Ages. Your soul came from
a time when dragons, knights, war and
Princesses ruled the land.

Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by

Where did your soul originate?

You come from the Ocean. You've always been drawn
to the sea, the sound of the waves, the crystal
blue water, near the sea is where you belong.

Where Did Your Soul Originate?
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This was strange

Ok here is what happened last night.As I mentioned before I've been waking up like someone is in my room watching me. Well I was having this really odd dream. There was this tall, thin, blonde headed man who was pagan. His face was hard, pronounced facial features. I had some back ground on him. He was a tad odd but I just figured it was him. He was there and I know there was one maybe two other women there. It was like a normal day as we moved around inside this house. This man said his name, it was a common name, but for the life of me I can't remember it. He always worried with his hands, fiddled with them while you spoke to him. Then one of the women whispered to me, "You know he was ( at this point there were two words) Convicted/Accused of murdering his wife. At this point I started quietly towards my bedroom, she went with me. I was telling her that I should have been told before now. I noticed he was sort of hovering around. Almost like stalking he was so quiet. When I got to my bedroom I picked up two guns. I distinctly remember picking up my Browning .45 and then another gun that I've never owned. It was also a .45, very similar to a Colt and it was champagne in color. That's what I noticed the most about it... It was heavier built than the Colt also. I couldn't find my belt to hold my blue jeans up. I had put the guns in my back pockets and the weight was pulling them down a little. I turned around to go out of my room and he was standing there. I could see he was questioning why I had the guns and what I thought I was going to do with them. I woke up at this point... Just like everyday this week.Now this is where it starts getting even more strange. I have a mirror that isn't hung yet and when I get out of bed I see myself in it and it's across the room. It has never bothered me before. This time however as I walked by I looked like I always do and got one of those deep down shivers. I didn't physical shiver but it was inside. I went into the bathroom sat down and I distinctly heard a woman's voice. She was just off to my left a bit. I couldn't quite make out what she said but it sounded like get your feet up off the ground. Her voice was monotone, almost like she was learning to speak. There was no inflection on the words at all. I slowly turned my head and listened again but heard nothing. So naturally with the dream and with hearing her I got my gun and went back to bed. I started thinking maybe she said get your gun up off the ground. It was laying on the floor next to the bed. I did tell her that not to take me being nervous as a sign that I didn't want to be able to hear her. I'm hoping she will try again so I can figure it out.


Then Branny wrote me and said Paul as the name and yes it is Paul. :-)

Christmas and stuff

I really enjoyed having both of my boys here for Christmas. They fought the whole time which was normal when Matt was living here. They love picking on each other. I had forgotten how noisey those two are. I had forgotten the boy games they played. Matt sat on Michaels face twice and farted. I don't understand this male right of passage. They both had fun. lol

I got 6 statues. The Trail of Painted Ponies. I love these things. They started out as life size sculptures. They are just amazing. Matt bought me two of the ones I already have so I'll have to figure out how to exchanged them since he bought them on-line.

I cooked dinner and breakfast. Matt pigged out. He and Michael fought all through both meals. They were touching each others food. *shakes head* I swear... they just enjoyed being around each other.

Today, Sunday we went to Mom and Dad's. It was decided that this year we would just have dessert. Of course Mom bought stuff for sandwiches, luckily because I was starving. lol Just about everyone had a sandwich so I wasn't the only one. I laughed because we had Pumpkin pie, Red Velvet cake, Chocolate cake, Coconut cake, Coconut Crem pie, Chocolate Ice box pie, bread pudding. Yes we all ate entirely too much. I wish I could throw up and it's been at least 5 hours since I last ate!

It was nice seeing everyone. My dad was on his best behavoir because mom made him. lol My mom is recording old letters to and from her mother. They are so cute. There was one that my Granny wrote to her husband. It was the sweetest love letter I've ever read. She adored him and it was so obvious. Most of the letters were just information of family and close family friends.

To show my sister and my connection here is a little story.
When I saw them walking up to the front door I ran and hide behind the door. Dale (Gay's husband) was the last one in. As he shut the door I poked him in the ribs and jumped back. Normally Dale would let out a string of curse words but was so surprised he spit and sputtered. Gay started laughing then others that witnessed his shock. Then Gay told me that before they left their house that she hide and did the same thing to him. She was laughing and said at least he didn't call you what he called me! Then we sat down and he said what is it you witches say? Something about times times return? Gay said 3 times. Dale said well my religion says 2. (He was just bullshitting), and proceeded to tell me that I had better be careful that one day I'd go to sleep. I just laughed at him. Then Gay tells that he scared Heather which is his youngest brother's wife the day before. She said he had been going on how funny it was they way she jumped. I looked at Gay and said well he said he believed in two times return and you and I both got him today. LOL He stillswears we'll pay. hehe

Ok, I'm off the computer now.

Good night.

What Celtic Goddess Are You?"

I took it twice because there are at least two things I would have answered. Actually there were 3 or 4 but I settled on two. I may take it again just to see. lol


Medb

What Celtic Goddess Are You?
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What Celtic Goddess Are You?"

You are Arianrhod.Arianrhod is a Welsh goddess associated with air,
the moon,retribution, and reincarnation.

What Celtic Goddess Are You?
brought to you by

The Fragrance Finder

Sensual Scents.You don't need to relax, and you are not in need of a pick-me-up. Instead, you're interested in arousing your partner's senses by marrying your cologne or perfume personality with the pheromones your body produces naturally. To increase sexual desire and cast a seductive spell over your lover, take advantage of the aromatic aphrodisiac of the following floral scents: exotic musk, woodsy cedar, rosewood, or even vanilla for men, and orchid, white musk, vanilla, lily, lilac, ylang-ylang, rose, or tuberose for women. There are many ways to enhance your body chemistry other than perfumes or colognes—tantalise your honey with the romance of tempting massage oils, romantic essential oils and incense, scented bath candles, aftershave, and body lotions scented with these fragrances.

http://www.hgtv.ca/etools/quizzes/floral_fragrance_main.asp/" target=_blank>http://www.hgtv.ca/etools/quizzes/floral_fragrance_main.asp/%3c/a>

Which Angel Or Demon Are You ?

Magic

?? Which Angel Or Demon Are You ??
brought to you by

Which Of The Seven Deadly Sins Are You ???

You are Lust!Sexy!! But they say that theres such a thing as too
much of a good thing. You have sex on the
brain, and it doesn't stay just there for long.
Passionate, Fiery - and most certainly
confident. You're a fun loving, spontaneous
person who is always up for a laugh. People
however, have trouble keeping up with you.
You're sex crazy, and perhaps need to tone it
down a bit! learn a little self control!But, Hey, Congratulations on being the Sexiest Red
Hot deadly sin out of all the 7...

?? Which Of The Seven Deadly Sins Are You ??
brought to you by

I'm watching King arthur again but this time with Matt. I must say that it stirs some serious emotions in me. I forgot to mention it last night but I really hate the Romans and I saw a helmet that was almost the same helmet in my vision. The helmet kind of shook me for a moment, then as I looked closely it's still not exact.

As I watched it last night I had a hard time with scene of the Romans fighting. The horses beauty helped me but still anger swelled inside me and I felt myself wanting revenge. *grins*

It's Christmas Eve afternoon. Michael finally went Christmas shopping. I think he took after me. I'm a procrastinator.

Yeah this year sucks. I don't think any of us three are really in the mood. The tree looks so strange without all the gifts that are usually under it. It's been really hard to get any of the three of us to be able to say what we wanted. Probably because none of us have the spirit this year.

I think I'm feeling a bit guilty about there not being so many presents under the tree. I keep trying to remember that we are minus the presents that would have been Tom's. Plus they haven't wrapped mine. I didn't buy any for family, except my mom. My dad is strictly into cold hard cash. That's what I'm giving my nieces and nephew. They could careless.

I'm starting to feel like I need to clean people out of my life. I know I can't with family but it's not like some of them care. That'd be the nieces and nehpew. There are others too but it's not in my nature to do that.

Could be time for change.

Rosemary

YOU ARE ROSEMARY

What herb are you?
brought to you by

Okkk

I'm back to reading Women on Top.

She is at the point of talking about how men and women look differently at love and sex. That men have these two things separated in their minds where we women don't. That men are afraid of reconnecting because they found their sexual indenpendance when they were young. We, women, spent all our time making sure we were connected. Such as the slumber parties, doing all the girly things together with our girl friends. Well some of us did that and some of us didn't.

I loved this part she wrote about after a night of sex the man is all energized in the morning ready to go to while the woman is wanting him to come back hold her and reconnect. To feel the same feeling that she felt during their love making. To feel close to them.

I had never thought of it like that. Really I had never given it any thought. I guess though it is about being close. Though I have to admit you don't have to have sex for that close feeling. I like holding hands or sitting close to the person I love. There are times I want my distance, my space, but I still like knowing that person will be there. Maybe going someone where with that person and sitting and just watching, knowing I can just lean into them or that they can touch me.

Another Necklace thought

So I finished up reading and watching King Arthur. Decided I was tired enought to go to bed.

I walk intot the bedroom thinking well I'll leave Epona on since I would have to untie and re-tie. I reached for the first necklace my hand touched and it was my pentacle necklace. I tried several times unsuccessfully to take it off. No matter what I did it would not work. So I said fine. I picked up the Morrighan necklace and it opened right up and came off.

I find that a bit strange because the pentacle and Morrighan have the same kind of necklace. Same clasp.

Also I noticed that the pentacle necklace kept getting tangled in my hair. Which is very annoying as it pulls those tender hairs at the base of your skull. The Morrighan didn't pull one hair. For the past for months my two necklaces had intertwined during the night and had to be untangled in the morning and throughout the day, actually. Yesterday not one time did any of the three intertwine. Last night with only the two on they didn't intertwine. I'm not sure what's up.

This dream took place in something like an orphanage.

The class room structure was very strict. We were brought together with another group and our group was more relaxed in class. The other group sat up straight and wasn't distracted by anything. They listened only to the teacher and never turned their heads when anything happened. The people I was with lived with each other. We were paired up with another person that we got along with. I was paired up with a girl younger than I who had a bob hair cut and black hair.

It seems to me like we also would rescue students who had been captured by this other group. In this dream there were two people that we had to rescue. Our.. I'm not sure what to call her. She was like our mother, teacher and so forth. Anyway I'll call her mother. Would set up these rescues and we would carry them out. So we looked in to see two of our people sitting in a class room. They were seated on the other side away from us. Mother was with us as a distraction. I remembered her yelling to them to run. They jumped up from their desk and ran towards the door but were stopped before we could get to them. The feeling wasn't one of dread and concern that they didn't make it but of oh well we got caught, we'll try again some other time. At some point in the rescue attempts we opened a door so the sunlight would go into the room so we could see the people we were trying to get.

Now we were all sitting in like a tv room or something. Watching/listening to shows that were on. My partner wanted to watch a show that came on before the one we were watching. I told her we didn't watch that show. She told me that we had all seen the show and liked it but the I *me* decided that we didn't like it. A couple of times during her outbust I said then go upstairs and watch it on one of those tv's but she refused. When she finished her letcure on it was my decision I turned to her and said "Fuck you. If you don't like it then go watch one of the other 3 tv's." It wasn't that I was mad it was that she wouldn't listen that she could go watch another tv. Two things were happening at one time here. She stood up and said "Then I don't know if we can be happy together" (She was referring to our sharing our room anymore). I was thinking was she right? Had I made that decision for everyone? Was I controlling what they were watching? She turned to walk off.

Then Mother said I had to go somewhere with her. I did so without question. We walked into a room that had other teachers/mothers in it. It was a meeting. They were discussing things like the rescues and such. They ranged in age but they all were similar in looks. Where we came in at there were two curved walkways to doors. I stopped and stood next to the first one to stay out of the way. The women began talking and I was looking around. I saw a sign on the walkway I was standing at that I didn't understand. Then I looked to the other and there was the symbol for women. (Like the bathroom sign). I thought "oh well there aren't any men so no harm in standing right here". I was giving a towel to go wash out so I went into the other walkway to the womens side. I walked in and started washing out this towel. This young boy came in talking 90 miles an hour to me. I thought "Oh no how did I wind up in the men's side?" I looked around the bathroom to convince myself I was in the right place. The little boy never missed a beat when I tried to say he was in the wrong place. He kept talking to me as he unzipped his pants and headed for the trashcan. I tried to say he could go in one of the stalls but he was already urinating in the trash can. I was kind of shocked because I didn't understand what was going on. Then this other little boy comes flying in yelling for the other one. He had been left behind and was upset. So the first boy kept talking and walked in one of the stalls with the other boy. My mind got stuck on how he was going to get to the stall without urinating on everything else.

Then I woke up.

I'm jumping from book to book these days. Reading a little from one and then off to another. Then back to the original one. So the past couple of days I've been I've been reading on Sex magick. So far I haven't gotten to the Sex Magick part but so far the history. Which is fairly interesting. One part made me think of Jo and her dissertation.

"It was in the 1950s, largely as a result of Gerald B. Gardner's writings about Witchcraft, that the Neopagan movement, which included techniques of sex magick including the "Great Rite," was born. Some of the ideas he presented were taken from the book Aradia or the Gospel of the Witches of Italy (1899) by Charles Leland, and the others were "borrowed" from Crowley. (Some people even claim that Gardner paid Crowley to create Wicca [or parts of it], but I have seen no documentation to support that theory.) The rebirth of Paganism has gone through various spurts of growth in each decade. The sex magick aspect of Witchcraft in many covens has become minor or virtually non-existent."
Chapter one page 33
The Secret History of Sex Magick by Donald Michael Kraig.

Now since I've never been heavily or even lightly into Wicca I have to admit I've never heard that rumor. However it is kind of interesting.

What else have I been up to today.... I just watched King Arthur... The just released version. I have to say that I liked this version a lot better than some of the others. Though I have to admit I have the hots for Gawain now. LOL
http://video.movies.go.com/kingarthur/mainsite.html

Ok, I got the hots for several of them actually. LOL AND the horses were gorgeous. Funny I'd find myself watching it as much for the horses as these men.

http://us.imdb.com/gallery/ss/0349683

The second and fourth photos are my favorites and shows how beautiful the horses are.


ok... I'm thinking about bed. Not sure yet... I'm getting tired.

So here I sit. I just cleaned my keyboard and I can't believe how much cat hair was in it! Damn! Oh and crumbs. hehe

Anyway Sitting here chatting with my wonderful friend Branny. :-) Listening to a cd from Great Big Sea
http://www.greatbigsea.com/

I'm breathing heavily thinking maybe I should study Woman on Top more. LOL I like this group though. Give them a listen if you haven't before.

Danny, Tom and I were walking around talking about cars and stuff. Danny asked me about my car. Something about that someone had said something. Tom immediately too over the conversation, and showed Danny his new car. Tom opened up this trailer to show Danny his new car and I said "He had asked about my car not your car". Tom showed him a red Cobra. I remember walking away annoyed that Tom had done that. It seemed like I was acrosse the street with Matt, Michael and someone else when Dallas showed up. I was annoyed that Tom had brought her but was being nice. She was walking around this blue car that I had put some wax on. I started telling her of the little nasty things he had been doing to me that day. She was listening to all the things and some of them seemed to really surprise her. At one point she popped up and said she loved us all and I quipped back that "I'n can't say I'm there YET". She looked funny at me. I can't remember what the look was, it wasn't surprise or shock. Just different.

********************************************

Funny it's 3:24am and I came to get this dream down. I check my emails and here is a horoscope for me today.

"In general, you have problems trusting people who are very demonstrative with their feelings, GEORGIA. Today, you might be thinking about your own imperfections. You may feel like taking your personality apart bit by bit, and you'll probably be better off doing it alone... if not, other people could feel your wrath! But try not to be too hard on yourself. And don't forget about the people that love you!"

Yep, the taking my personality apart started last night. and here it shows up in this. lol

Love Sign's

I picked this book up Monday and just opened it up. Well really I've been ready for about an hour... maybe two with a lot of interruptions.

Anyway I was reading about Scoprios and Cancers. They are suppose to be perfect for each other, so that's good news Osran! :-) Of course that moon also affects that. I've read about Scoprio's and Libra's... Tom is in for some interesting times. I've checked Cancer and Gemini. Now that is a funny match. He says (according to the book) "I don't know what she is thinking". She says "I don't know what he wants". LOL So far I like where it says she has something important to teach him about love. He disregards is when he feels it's done. Not Cancer she holds on to it until it is worn out and that may takes years and even then she will put a patch on it to make do. This is one of Cancer's secrets that she can share with Gemini. Oh I forgot to say I'm reading Gemini men and Cancer Women. That's why I'm being gender specific.

Reading about Cancer so far I haven't argued with what has been said.

Horses in my dreams

Last nights dream had many different thoughts going on.

Horses have been in my dreams a lot lately.

I was searching for a horse to ride. My friends father was in charge of this place where we were. I got the feeling that it was like a fort. There were a lot of men and horses around and the men were armed. I remember she and I running around getting into things. Playing and hiding. So her father and the men had gotten on horses and she and I were going to play and ride around. I saw three horses standing together. They were all the same color but had different markings. One was a paint with not a lot of white on it's body but I remember seeing some on it's neck. So I pointed it out and said that's the one I want. She and I went towards them and they ran. As this dream went on with us trying to catch these three I noticed that they were young horses. Probably not even broken yet. I was ready for the task though. At some point the girl got upset with me and started acting like she was superior or something.

I finally caught the horse that I had been trying to catch. I do remember watching the men ride out. I saw tall golden grassy stuff waving in the breeze and then I don't remember seeing them anymore. I held a bridle up to the horse I had caught and it opened it's mouth to allow the bit to slide in. We were walking through these hallways. These hallways twisted and turned and we went through them to go somewhere.

The girl was riding her horse and I walked as it seemed like we were in a barn. I walked with the horse past what was the tack room. There were bits and bridles. This place had been abandoned. I walked in and was touching these things left behind. The thoughts running through my head were about these things being left behind that were in good condition. I walked further and found the uniforms of the men who had been there. I will say that in the dream they weren't uniforms like we think of but they shirts were all the same except for the different ranks. I touched them all as I wandered through. I remember thinking how good the quality of the material was and of the dust on them. It was a little sad knowing this had all been left behind.


Then I woke thinking of someone.

**********************************************

The night before had taken place out in the open. There was a field and people all around though it wasn't crowded. I went down in this pit but once in there it was a house. Dirt floor and wooden walls. I had gone in there because Sassy was there. I got hold of her and was going to walk her out but there was only one way out that I was being shown. It was a doorway and then steps. I stopped and looked at the girl at the top of the steps. She said you can come out this way. I looked at the doorway and it was barely wide enough for a person much less a horse. The girl said what's wrong your horse can't go up steps? She kind of smirked. I looked around and said no the steps are no problem, it's the doorway. I said look at her, you think I can get her big ass through there and laughed. I knew Sassy would have no problem negotiating the stairs but I knew she couldn't fit through the doorway. I turned looking for another way out and then woke up.

The Trouble With Love Is

I don't know what to say... There are just so many emotions running through my head that I don't know which end is up.

Why are there so many movies about love on?

Why are there feelings you can't forget?

Why do memories haunt you?

Why can't emotions just be shut down?

I'm tired... I want and I don't want... I need and then I don't need... I feel a desparate desire and then desparate disappears. This is a vicious cycle that goes around and around.

I don't know what I want as my mind is so unclear.


"The Trouble With Love Is

"Oooh oooh, ooooh yeah, mmmm...

Love can be a many splendored thing
Can't deny the joy it brings
A dozen roses, diamond rings
Dreams for sale and fairy tales
It'll make you hear a symphony
And you just want the world to see
But like a drug that makes you blind,
It'll fool ya every time

The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See, you got no say at all

Now I was once a fool, it's true
I played the game by all the rules
But now my world's a deeper blue
I'm sadder, but I'm wiser too
I swore I'd never love again
I swore my heart would never mend
Said love wasn't worth the pain
But then I hear it call my name

(The trouble with) The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See, you got no say at all

Every time I turn around
I think I've got it all figured out
My heart keeps callin' and I keep on fallin'
Over and over again
The sad story always ends the same
Me standin' in the pourin' rain
It seems no matter what I do
It tears my heart in two

(The trouble with love is) The trouble with love, yeah
(It can tear you up inside) It can tear you up inside
(Make your heart believe a lie) Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride

(The trouble with love is) It's in your heart
It's in your soul (doesn't care how fast you fall)
You won't get no control(and you can't refuse the call)
See, you got no say at all

(The trouble with love is) Oh, yeah
(It can tear you up inside)
(Make your heart believe a lie)

Wednesday and Confusion

Today has been a day where my brain isn't firing on all cylinders. I've been forgetful. It's just weird.

I've just started putting ornaments on my tree. Got all my packages in the mail. All my cards are gone. Oh and there are a few people who are just getting their Samhain cards. LOL Yeah had them in my car and forgot to mail them. LOL

Back to the ornament thought. I've just got a few on there but at least it's looking better. lol I don't even have a fourth of them on yet. lol I'm debating if I want to put ribbon on it this year or not. Maybe I will...

My Inner Rock Chick

You Are Avril Lavigne! A bit hardcore on the outside...But sweet and sensitive on the inside."It's a damn cold nightTrying to figure out this life" Who's Your Inner Rock Chick? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Pieces of dreams

Last night I think Trouble was visiting. I remember seeing him several times through out the night. I kept trying to catch up with him but never could. Something always got in the way.

Last night my dreams were a bit scattered.

The last dream I remember was I was in Vegas or somewhere that had slot machines. My sister in law had carved her name in the machines. The thing is though that I think it was my name instead...

When I told her I saw it she was defensive ans said so what are you going to do about it? I laughed and said "I'd say that's my sister in law". She had no sense of humor.

***************

Then I dream of being somewhere with an actor and his wife. It was someone like Robert Redford, I think.. They had horses. There was a farm also. I was talking to them and the man made a face that people can't make. It was more like a horse when they raise the upper lip in th air. It was however a human face that was doing it. I remember looking at him and thinking why is he doing that?

**************

I think I picked up some of Earth Sea in my dreams last night. That's about all I can remember right now about my dreams.

Dreams last night

I had many dreams last night


I found myself going to another country. There wasn't any excitement about it and it seemed like old hat. Like maybe it was part of my job. So I get there and this bathroom was being remodeled. I got up in the truck to look at the cabinets that were going in. The counter tops were already on the cabinets. I didn't say anything but I heard a voice say they are much lighter than you think. They are a tenth of the weight of regular ones. So I started moving some stuff off the one that had the sink. There were installing items on it. The guys came and got the one that I put the stuff on. They dumped the stuff on the floor. One guy grabbed one and went off with it. So I slide the one with the sink to the end of the truck for the other guy. He gave me that look like are you crazy? He said it will take both. In my head I was thinking but the guy said they were light he should be able to pick this one up.

Then I found myself wanting to help load some stuff inside the truck off of a trailer. The guy said no has to be on trailer. (That wasn't a example of my bad grammar he did speak english well) I said oh they have to be able to see what you have. He looked very serious and said yes. There was some unspoken conversation that went on. About going through the check points and stuff. That the papers had to be in order.

So then a man, an American, told me that I needed to be careful. I asked why and he told me I was being too outspoken for a woman in this country. I was kind of taken back and informed him that I was not from that country and I would act like I wanted. Then I was standing with some soldiers. There were 4 or 5 of them. We were looking down on the village. The two women were discussing it also. One said they (meaning the country) should just get over that women didn't need to be controlled and told how to act. The other one said that it wouldn't be a problem if women weren't in the military. She said something else that made sense but this is the part I remember her saying. I felt like she had become submissive.

Then I found out I was in Israel.


Then I found myself with Tom going to a clients house (this is something we didn't do unless it was to inspect a vehicle). They were leaving to go somewhere so Tom was standing in their garage talking to the man who was in the van. I was standing there just behind Tom. The man spoke to me calling me by name. For some reason I had to change clothes right then. I was all of a sudden naked standing there shaking my shirt out but I couldn't get the shirt open to put it on. I kept thinking good grief, how long does it take to get dressed. Tom was explaining to the guy was I was putting my clothes on but I don't remember what he said. Then I wanted to ask if I could go in their house to get dressed but didn't.

Then I woke..


When I went back to sleep I was with bunch of women. We were at a retreat or something. It seemed like a bunch of people from the Grove. I never saw the two women who I was bunking with as it seem to start in a strange point. These two women got up and started whispering to each other. They were ready to get up but it was still dark and I didn't want to get up that early. Their whispers were a little too loud and so I lay there and could hear bits and pieces of what they were saying. I heard Corey ( I know I said I didn't know who they were but that was the name that came when she started speaking) started saying that she had known ahead of time but couldn't tell anyone. There was more said that I could only hear a word or two of then I heard her say Georgia. So I listened harder and she said she "knew because he had told her that he couldn't tell me because he knew it would hurt me". The other woman I couldn't hear except for noises. So I stirred and thought I'll get her to tell me more. They immediately quit talking. So I tried to get her to tell me and she excused herself to get a shower. So I started trying to get the information out of the other woman. She was really worried and said she didn't know anything. I knew she did cause I her heard talking.

So I got up and dressed and found myself in another room.. It was kind of like you walked in off the little street into all these rooms. I was in there still thinking on what had happened earlier when Laurence showed up. He came in and started talking to me. Telling me he would give me some "catch phrases". We were laughing and talking, had some serious discussion and I managed to get jelly on his shirt. That for some reason really made us laugh. I think I did it on purpose. LOL He got serious and said he would give me those catch phrases that would help.

Then I woke up. That's all I can remember.

Monday's some times suck

All right... This is just a fucked up day I guess. It can be so great being a Cancer. You get to have all these wonderful yoyo emotions.

Right now I'd like to chew some people out but I know it's because of the way I'm feeling. NOT to mention I'm on my period so I'm even MORE emotional than usual. Now did you see anything wrong in those two sentences? Anything terrible? Well, I almost cried just typing them. This is ridiculous

I fought with my damn christmas tree all day yesterday. The fight started last weekend but I didn't feel like dealing with it so I let it slide. It's a pre-lite tree and we got it last year I think and the damn thing had one third of the lights out this year. So I went and bought more lights. I had 3 sets that I put on and went and bought 9 more sets. I left the bottom row of the limbs off. If I hadn't I'd need three more sets of lights. So I will go buy some more this week. I wanted to have it decorated by this past Sunday but I only have the lights on it. I think I became a sailor while doing the lights on the tree. I think most of the words in my sentences were cuss words. There were even sentences that didn't have anything but cuss words in it.

I know it's bad when I'm even mad at the animals. They aren't doing anything bad it's just me. I'm trying extra hard not to fuss at them.

Gotta get more coffee be back in a minute.


Ok.. fresh cup...

Wow the wind has really kicked up. My flag is blowing straight out. LOL

On a good note Matt is spending the night Christmas Eve. :-) That made me happy. I was going to ask him and he informed me of his intentions. LOL So now I probably should buy a bed for him to sleep in. All I need is a frame and mattress. He could sleep on the sofa but I just don't want him to feel like he doesn't have a place to sleep.

It's really a beautiful day to day. The sky is crystal clear. Not a cloud in the sky. Days like this make me wonder about my moods. So if I respond to anyone and it sounds curt please don't take it that way.

I've been reading Women on Top on Laurence's suggestion. So I've spent today reading about masturbation. LOL Good old self pleasuring. Hey it's a good thing don't get me wrong. It's been rather interesting reading on the why's of it. Some of it had never really crossed my mind and yet other parts made me go yeah, that's right.

I'm tired, have a headache and am cramping. LOL This is after taken 2 excedrin.

I've got presents to wrap but no motivation to do so.

Sunday night dream

I went somewhere with a bunch of people. The main male character was very familiar to me though I can't say who he was.

He stopped by a place and they cut my hair. I didn't seem to even give it a second thought. So off we went to caught up with the others. I can't explain where we were because it shifted scenery too often. Sometimes it seemed like a field and some times like a beach or lake. I know that in every place there was water involved. So got out of the car and started down some steps inside a building which lead us out doors. We were just in time to see them all jump this stream. The guy said go ahead and I'll be right along. I walked up to this stream but it was a good 10 feet jump across. I turned to him and said "I can't jump that far". Though I had just watched all the others do it. He said "of course you can they did it without any problems". I looked at it a couple of times thinking I could just will myself across it. Then when I looked down again it wasn't more than maybe 2 feet wide and had koi in it. I started talking to the man again but this time about the koi. I told him I really liked the butterfly koi better because of their longs flowing fins. One fish came to the top of the water to greet me. I started looking around and realized this "stream" was only about 4 feet long and maybe 1 foot deep. Mind you though the water was flowing like a streams. I told the man that, that was not adequate for the koi. They needed more room and deeper water. Then my brain caught on that all I had to do was walk around this "stream" to get to the other side. So I did.

Then we were at a beach or lake. They were all playing in the water and I was talking with this man still. He was quite silly. He kind of reminded me of Dr. Brown in Back the the Future. He did know a lot about science and was telling me things. Then I passed by a mirror and was all of a sudden in this building. Every thing was completely white. The doors were the only noticeably things. When I looked in the mirror they had cut my hair to shoulder length and it was feather around my face. The biggest surprise though was all the blonde streaks. For that fact my hair was almost completely blonde. The man said I wondered when you were going to look at yourself. I liked the cut but was not sure about the color at all. Then my brain started in... I wasn't there long enough for color and I don't remember them doing that. Then we moved on back to the beach/lake. What was kind of strange about this part was I didn't get a human feeling. We had to come out of the water and I remember it was difficult to do. We crawled a bit and then got up and started walking. This part happened within just a matter of seconds, though it seemed it took much longer. Every thing seemed very primal to me at this point.

This man intrigued me throughout this dream. He didn't looked like anyone I know but he was very familiar. He was tall, blondish hair, athletic. A soul connection.

Thinking

With all the talk that's been on WG about paths and such it's made me think about my own.

I'm happy with my path for the most part though I do have things I want to change or add to. I feel the need to grow and to stretch my beliefs further than I have before. The desire to learn is starting to be like a burning ember which has had little straw put atop it...

The Mysteries call and they are calling loudly. There is something that I am needing to remember from before. Something I've not accessed this time around. The connection with the land in Wales made me realize it. Trevor put in my hand a handful of earth and I felt the quickening with that act. There is an I am feeling coming to me. Something that I've not experienced before. It's greater than learning who I am, possibly learning what I am.

I forgot to mention above but Mab taking me to the Black Mountains... Her love for that place made me bond with the land. It is one of the few places where I saw imprints on the land. Two people running below where we sat. So clear... yet knowing it was a memory of the land.

I am ready for this.

Animals

It's funny to me but Marvin (cat) and Curly (dog) both love my hair. Marvin puts his nose in my hair and starts kneading like there's no tomorrow. If I bend over and let my hair hang down over him he rises up on his hind legs and bats my hair a bit. Curly... Now he is just goofy. If I lay on the floor and play with him he always gets in my hair and rolls around. If I'm propped up on my elbow he push his way into my hair and rolls over. *grins* Then rolls around. He snorts and sniffs. It's really kind of funny. It makes both of them very happy.

I found this to be very interesting

Subject: Fwd: Master Kireal -2005
Master Kirael's Predictions for 2005

Master Kirael through the loving mediumship of Kahu Fred Sterling (originally published in Sedona Journal, December 2004, and available online at www.kirael.com)

Introductory comments by Kahu Fred Sterling
Two thousand five -- the year of transitions! This year will be a time when the whole of the world will be thinking less in duality and more about bringing love into balance -- not romantic love, but rather the kind of love that allows one to look at the larger scale of unfolding events. And if there is a key word to contemplate this coming year, it is this: integrate.

The world of healing through love and intent is about to burst wide open. In the new year integrative healing studies will become the focus, and early in the year, those of you who have been practicing behind closed doors will be so highly sought after that it will look like the proverbial coming out of the closet. Why was Master Jesus killed for his belief in healing? The same reason many powerful healers have stayed behind the veils until now. Most of us still carry the cellular memory of what happens when one goes against the status quo. Well, we can all look forward to great healings and awakenings in the coming year, even in the world of religion.

Another subject I asked Master Kirael to focus on is that of the political awakening of our planet. In the following text he dissolves some of our oldest belief systems into particles of enlightenment. In the end you will see a picture of 2005 through the eyes of a master guide and see that you and I actually have a chance to live the life we have only recently begun to believe possible.

Please remember that if you read a prediction you truly would want to become a reality, let your heart lead you to hold the vision of its manifestation, for if enough of us visualize the same outcome, there is nothing to stop it from becoming a reality.

Master Guide Kirael
KIRAEL: This year of 2005 is the one you will be talking about for the next four or five of your years. In 2005 three of your major entities will undergo almost complete reformation: the art of politics, the well-entrenched dogma of your religions, and the huge cover up of that magical spell you are under called the medical world (and believe me, this one will shake the rafters).

At the end of 2005 you will refer back to this writing and ask, Master Kirael, why didn't you tell us the whole of it? Why did you just uncover the first few layers of a world that was about to turn upside down? The answer to that, my friends, is that the final chapters have not been carved in stone as yet. What I will tell you is that, at this time, you are just seeing the tip of the iceberg.

Tis a planetary awakening that will happen in 2005 with such influence that it will realign the most progressive of thinkers into a force that will cause your political system to enter its final phase under its current way of thinking. Under the new paradigm of energy, those wanting to be politically influential will begin to seek their base as early as mid-year. And they will know that they must be living under the same understanding as the rest of "We the People" and that they will truly need a finger on the pulse of change.

Their old cronies will not stand for them any more, and they will feel the power of this new awakening surging through the average being of the world -- and I am not talking just about the Americas. Because the current of understanding will be so enriched with knowing, no one will dare use the old spin-doctors> for fear of their lives -- that's right, lads and lasses, fear for their political lives.

We the People will see through the lies and deceit so fast that recovery of the "old boy network" will become nonexistent. Early in 2005 the ability to bluff through arrogant text and the verbal misuse of the trust placed in them will not be tolerated, and in this light the world sees its first recognition of a great shift in consciousness. We the People take charge of their lives in such force that it looks like the hundredth monkey theory in action.

I will set the pace of these predictions with the following prophecy: In your 2008 elections (and don't start thinking that * is so far off), the U.S. will either be privileged to have its * first female president or, short of that, a male that is so balanced you won't even consider his sexual persuasion because you will hear him proudly proclaim to be a spiritualist. That's right, it will be the first election contrived, propagated and finally won by a surge of independent believers, who, by the way, will be quite different than your current independent types. In this way you will get your first glimpse of the Great Shift in consciousness. Soon into 2005 a third party of the former "silent majority" will surge to greater recognition and never once look back.

Tis a platform to be based on truth, trust, and a grand passion for We the People like you have not seen since the founding fathers so innocently set the United States of America in motion. Many will reread the piece of paper called the Constitution with a new enthusiasm. In the early parts of 2005, as you open your eyes to seeing many of your rights erode, so will you also become aware of a new balance of fearless groups of lightworkers with the tenacity to see this shift into its own awakening. Tell your political friends to seek change or a new way of life.

The current religions of the world are in for a bit of an upset, as the very first parts of the new year will see many renewing their search for the meaning of the Creator. Many who now sit on the fence of indecision will finally move towards forgetting the dogma of a vengeful God and begin to recognize the gift humanity has in the realizing of a Creator that allows for errors to be made and does not think of retribution. What the Creator does allow is for one to keep repeating the same lesson plan in different forms until they get it right. Suffering through the same lesson plans over and over is optional.

In 2005 some of the stranger unfoldings will be the beginning stages of We the People remembering that matter projections, such as weather patterns, can be influenced by mass thought. This type of belief will work its way towards acceptance, and discoveries such as these will be setting the stage for many innovative, proactive awakenings of We the People, and in that light the world reaches a new crescendo in this new year. This also will be setting the stage for further developments, such as integrative medicine.

(Now, you might as well be telling your friends who you are and what you know about healing. Tell them about the full measure of the four levels of healing -- the physical, the emotional, the mental and the spiritual. This may be a bit of a reach for you, yet I'm thinking that you truly don't have a lot of alternatives this year.)

The genius mind will prevail in the alerting of the most seniormedical tacticians, proving once again that medical costs are derivative of a bureaucratic establishment, and in order to preserve the so-called medical system that currently chokes the life out of the average human, they must begin to reduce the dependency on the medical world.

In the seeking of integrative practices, these same doctors will be so much better off in cooperation with the integrative way of life that they will not hesitate to be of service to We the People in that way. That's right; in 2005 the MD [medical doctor] will be the greatest ally of We the People. Money for integrative healers will be available in a form of coverage yet un-shelved by the politicos. It is already there; they just truly don't want you to see it until they are left with absolutely no other recourse -- or better said, until they can squeeze the last drop of financial worth from the system.

In 2005 the religions of the world will be rethinking the struggle to keep their followers in one level of thinking and begin recruiting drives that are unprecedented in modern day history. They will use the "new wave" concept in attempting to appropriate followers from their counterpart's rank and file. This will be causing a bit of a swell of new thinkers who will seek in earnest for a new way of seeing the dogma they have used for years.

The general thinking of churches will be to truly become sanctuaries -- not places to hide but moreover locations where people will come together to search for the true meaning of the Creator force. It has taken centuries to land the people where they are now in their belief systems, and in 2005 little community churches will sprout up like wildflowers. The new ministers of these safe havens will know that their responsibility is to create a space where We the People can learn and grow in a spiritual nature -- not just based on what they know but what the whole of the congregation knows. Support will come from within as they need it.

Peace movements will have some of the appearances of the nineteen sixties, but instead of the hippies of that generation taking the lead, it will be more of a grassroots campaign led by the mothers of the world. No, it will not just be mothers with children; in fact it will not even be solely female. What it will be are those people who believe that peace is possible and in that, they will be following the age-old thinking that a mother would use. They will say, "No more! No more killing of my sons. No more hurting of Mother Earth!" It will be a movement that will rock the nations. They will not accept the borders laid down by ancestors. They will ask for and receive from those they have birthed into this world an explanation of just what is going on, and they will get answers.

This 2005 will be seen as a year of small gatherings that, when necessary, will begin to join forces. Not to cause bedlam in the overmastermind. Not to bring chaos into the powers that have chosen to share only what they think the people can handle. These little groups will be so swift in motion that, with an instant's notice, they can bring huge masses of the population together for a cause and then simply meld back into their individual awakenings when they have completed their undertaking. This is the year where We the People have your best chance at change.

The stage is set for those with the greatest intent to bring a new measure of leadership to focus. How then does this smaller group bring change to the few that have always strived for control for so long? How can those choosing to find peace through new means intend to influence the small infestation of men who have taken it upon themselves to set the standard of how the masses will live? It is a new movement, my friends, that will sweep the world in this coming year of 2005, and they will unite in a fashion that has seldom, if ever, stood so proud enough to say, "I am just plain tired of the secrets, lies and spins that we have been fed for so long, and I demand change."

The energy of 2005 is transition, a change to the understanding that We the People are finally going to take charge of their own destiny, and in that light the most beautiful aspects of this Great Shift in consciousness will prevail. No more will doom and gloom cloud your thinking. Now is the time to realize that, through your individual intent to heal, the world can begin to see a new hope for the future. Do it now my friends!

Good evening.

Surprise... Tom gave me a christmas bonus. Now I just have to get him to start paying me my regular paycheck.

My damn tree is having light issues. I can't figure out where the problem is though. Michael was suppose to help me last week figure it out. So I'm taking a break from having issue with the tree and the lights. lol

I'm hot... think it's like hot flashes. I could set the world on fire right now.

Ok, I need to have issues resolved or I'm going to really hate christmas this year.

Tom Rant

No I haven't had one in a while. I'm sure you're all thinking thank the Gods for that.

Anyway, he just told me that he will be leaving on Thursday and will be back January 2nd. So now I thought he told Michael nothing had changed. That he would still be spending time with him? Doesn't sound like it to me. He said if they didn't get him presents before he left that he would take them to dinner when he got back and they could give him his presents then. Now I'll say he has already given Matt his. Michael is just so freakin hard to buy for. I really mean that. So Tom is thinking about getting him dual monitors for his computer. I swear it's hard to find something to give Michael. LOL

Anyway the whole point is that he is AGAIN going to miss being with Michael for a holiday. To me it proves how much Michael means to him.

As for me I don't care but it's the point that he made promises and isn't keeping them.

Dreams

Friday night:

I was walking along a path. It seemed like a gravel based path, lots of trees. I came around a bend and there on the right was a rack cliff. This path was at the bottom of it. I saw two people climbing it. It seem to be far away because of how small the people appeared. There was a path that led straight to this rock face. It was wider than the path I was on. I felt like I was in a car during this above. This man crossed my path and I thought great you didn't even look I couldn't have run over you. He turned and looked at me and smiled. I remember being shocked because her was a teacher. I smiled in return and felt a little humbled by it. Then I realized I was on foot.

I continued on my path and I saw two people riding horses. I said I wish I had known you could ride horses, I could have brought Sassy. There was no noticeable change and all of a sudden I was on Sassy. My sister in law was riding double with me. I never saw her but that was what I assigned to the presence behind me. We were riding up and hill and Sassy was running. I felt my SIL shifting like she was going to fall off. I turned Sassy so she wouldn't fall off but I realized she was going to anyway. I slide with her and put my foot on the ground to keep her from falling. Then I woke.

*********************************

Last night when I went to bed I must have been really tired. I fell right asleep and woke up in the same position this morning.

I was with two other females. I think in this I was the oldest. Anyway we were at a school or camp or something along those lines. I remember two other people there that were like elders. We three females were going to go doing something but we started playing. It was like we were putting on a play or doing something the 2 elders had asked. The three of us picked up our brooms and jumped on them and rode around. We rode like you do on a stick horse. We were laughing and chasing each other. Then we were at a house type thing. We were all laughing and joking around. We were getting ready to go search for stones. I remember that we did go looking for them. There were a lot of them in the ground but they were all polished and laying surrounded by dirt but not covered. We were stopping and looking at the stones and identifying them.

We got in the car of a friend of mine but he seem to take on an older male role in the dream. We wanted to go a certain place and he wanted us to go to this lake where his family was. We were laughing and talking about it when I said he just wants us to go to the lake. He laughed and said yes. The dream changed.

Three of us were going to a concert or something along those lines. We were in a lot of traffic. The traffic to the right were the ones who already had their tickets. The traffic to the left were the ones who needed to pick up their tickets. We pulled into the left side and were pulling forward like we were standing in line yet we were in cars. I almost hit this woman because they were stopped and I just didn't see it. I kept from hitting her and she gave me the look. She said just pull up there because that's ... (I don't remember what she said here) I said no I'm getting tickets so I need to stay here. By this point it seemed like we were standing in line instead. I woke up.

Wednesday night dream

I was at an airport with some people. I don't know who they were. I sat down in this seat with this grandmotherly type person. It all of a sudden seemed like this was a single chair and not designed for more than one person. I was talking to the grandmother person and I moved her forward in the chair and got behind her and started massaging her back. She had something underneath her jacket on her left side. It felt like a shoulder holster. I kept massaging her back an then she was gone.

I walked through the airport and it was changing as to what it was. It turned into a mall and I walked around looking at stuff. I remember being up on the top floor and looking down thinking that it was interesting looking. There was a sunken circle built in the floor. Made of the same tile the floor was made of. I walked some more and wound up going to help Tom in his room. He was studying on a case. It felt like it has between he and I lately. Just acquaintances. I had packed my bag. I remember putting this pair of red high heels in the bag. It made me think of Roxanne. He had started packing his. I wound up packing his bag to find there was another one he hadn't packed. He was just laying on the bed reading his file. The second bag was a garment bag. When I opened it up there were two hair brushes in there. I turned to him and said why would you need a hair brush? I was making fun of his thinning hair. I noticed that the hair brush had blonde hair in it. Immediately my mind went to what I could do magickally with that hair. I went in to the bathroom and started gathering his stuff. I came back out and there was a monster movie on the tv. It seemed like a Godzilla movie. The tv changed to a window and the monster was looking in the window and broke it out. I ran away from the window towards the door. There was a little girl with me that I hadn't seen before. Nor did I see her after this point. The whole scene shifted.

Then I woke.


I was able to finally go back to sleep and it started out that my mom was driving me to a friends house. I had my overnight bag. When I knocked on the door my friends dad opened it. He stepped back before the door was open and was standing in the middle of the room saying come in. I walked in and noticed the layout of the furniture of the room, it looked chaotic. There was no pattern to this furniture layout. As I walked in to put my bag down the dad said hey you bring your gun? Is it in your bag? I want to look at it. I remember thinking yes I have it but no I'm not showing it to you. It's not a toy. I turned around and there was my friend sitting in one of the chairs I had walked by. I hadn't noticed her at all and she didn't speak when I had walked in. All I could see were her feet and lower legs. I could never see anymore of her than that.

I woke up then because the alarm went off.