Stuff

I find myself thinking a lot lately but these are thoughts that do not come to the surface of my mind. These thoughts lay inside and seem locked away. They lay just out of reach. I feel the importance of them yet I don't know them. How can thoughts like these be hidden from you? Your own thoughts keep themselves from you knowing them. How interesting to know your mind is busy working on things and still it doesn't let you know what or how it is going to be resolved.

It seems my life is this way more oft than not. I feel these things laying below the surface but have not yet been able to pull them out. All I can do is sit and wait for them to make themselves known to me. It doesn't make me sad, it just makes me wonder what it is that keeps these things from me.

So life is odd.

Something vexes thee?

Today the boys and I went to see Pirates of the Carribbean. I enjoyed the movie and I have to agree with Anna, I liked when they ripped Orlando's shirt off. lol The scenery was beautiful, and I loved how gorgeous the water was. The beaches were beautiful and made you want to be there.

Mab posted her photos of Glastonbury and I felt homesick. It's interesting since I've been there once. Still it happened. I enjoyed her photos though. One day I'd like to go back and spend more time there.

My neighbor just stopped by and gave me some squash. I thought it was sweet of them really. When I came back in with it I remembered Roxanne's message about getting too much squash and sneaking to neighbors houses and leaving it for the. lol

What is it that life has in store for me? Sometimes I wish I had at least a hint so I would know so I could make the best choices. I'm just happy to be alive I guess but I still wonder. I have so many questions and no answers that I can find. I know in time but again I would like them now. I want so much and yet fear at the same time. I still haven't learned to trust myself.

These are the times I just want to run away and hide. I hate this.

Dickless at his best

Here is Dickless at his best.

"As I told you I will not be able to continue to support you in that house. As of the end of July I will be off of the utility accounts. I will pay through the end of July. After that you will be responsible for the Cobb County Water, Cobb EMC for gas and electric, Directv and telephone. I am cancelling the dsl at the same time.

I can no longer afford to pay the utilities. Make arrangements to put them into your name. Michael is welcome in my house if he needs to. "

Yeah he is playing phsycological games still. See my birthday was also my wedding anniversary. So what does he send me? Yep this nice little bit of information. I guess it's better than the way he just cut my cell phone and email off.

Yes I still do hope he has a sunstroke and drowns in the pool. It won't make me feel one bit bad.

I just sat here and watched the movie "Must Love Dogs". I enjoyed it but it made me think. You know about the whole dating thing. I mean in the movie they lied about who they were simpyl for a date. Why? What's the point in lying about who you are? Why tell them you are something you aren't? Why be something you aren't?

I don't know how to be something I'm not.

As I watched the movie I noticed things that really bother me. The insincerity of the men she went out with. Ok, except for one. I find it a little more than fightening that this is what is expected from men. Why are they held to a different standard? I don't want to hear about society, yes I know that's true but why haven't we tried and change it?