Thursday, September 30, 2004

Life


I've decided that what Tom is doing is on purpose. My sister brought up a good point that maybe it's chicken shit way of telling me he is getting engaged. Of course then the jewlers called yesterday. Do you think he got the message? No. He is sending these things to me to be hurtful. Dumb fuck.

Now I'm at a point where I don't know that I want to worry with him at all any more. I mean do I want the seven arrows of Sekhmet to hit him? On one level yes and I hope they are poison tipped at that. Do I want to worry with him anymore? No I don't.

He saw where I charged my Vegas airfare and sent me a stupid email that said I couldn't tell if it was a one way or not. You visiting or moving. I ignored his first one. The second one he sent got this response. Yes Michael and I are moving to Vegas. I know that icy hand gripped his heart because I felt it do so. After he sent me that other email that I ranted about when he got to the office he tried to make small talk. He asked me about my trip to vegas. I said we talked about it last month. He never remembers so why do I even bother. One day I'm going to tell him something important about the boys and he is going to miss it.

Ok... It's lunch time and I need to eat something.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Dream Last Night


I love dreams like this. I got to ride Sassy all night. Of course I incorporated just about everything I blogged about yesterday.

A bunch of us (just people) were riding to a campground. I know my mom and sister and dad were going to be there. So we were riding and we were on the shoulder of a Interstate. None of the cars got close to us and I don't remember a lot of traffic. So we were just having normal conversations as we rode. We were laughing and joking. There was a police car up ahead, as we got closer he told us to move our horses over on to the grass median. You could tell he was happy about being there. She we moved over and I remember saying doesn't he know that we are collecting food for people? (This was because I read a story about the Tulsa PPD having legal trouble) Then we were riding up a hill that was like a tunnel but it was all natural. People started letting their horses run up this little incline. I urged Sassy but she just wanted to walk. So I said fine let's just relax. We had reached the camp ground. My mom said that we were camped in the M section. So my sister and I were riding around looking for section M. It was really strange because this camp ground was more like a huge room. There were beds every where and people were setting up camp. I remember when we found Section M then we found our bed I said but there is one bed. The people running it said they are bunk beds. I looked and it still looked like one bed to me. Then the people next to us showed me that the bed lifted up and there was another bed underneath it. I still wasn't impressed. So all of a sudden we were all set up in the campsite and my family was all talking and my sister moved and there was Froggie. He grinned at me and said I told your sister everything. Then he laughed and blushed. I just stood there for a moment and grinned at him.

Then I found myself at my aunt's house and they were having a family reunion. She drove Micael and I somewhere and then she disappeared. Michael was driving back to her house. We didn't know for sure how to get there because we had only been there once. Michael took a wrong turn but as we were turning around I saw the house and there was a black horse out by the cars. That was how I knew it was her house. The only problem was it was a one way road going the wrong way. I told Michael not to worry about it and drive up there any way. We were just mingling with family members when I woke.

It was a very relaxing dream. Anytime I get to ride Sassy I feel good the next day.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Don't ask cause I have no clue. When I was little my dad use to play these records and I loved certain songs. This was I learned when I was 4 or 5 years old. lol I loved the melody even though it's a mournful song.


Whispering Pines
by Johnny Horton

The snowflakes fall as winter comes
And time just seems to fly
Is it the loneliness in me that makes me want to cry
My heart is sad like a morning dove that's lost its mate in flight
Hear the coooing of his lonely heart through the stillness of the night

CHORUS:
Whispering pines, whispering pines, tell me is it so
Whispering pines, whispering pines, you're the one who knows
My darlin' is gone, ohh she's gone
And I need your sympathy
Whispering pines send my baby back to me

See that squirrel up in the tree, his mate there on the ground
Hear their barking call of love, for the happiness they've found
Is my love still my love, ohh this I gotta know
Send the message by the wind, because I love her so

-- CHORUS




Rawhide!


As funny as it seems I was standing there washing up a few dishes. Weren't very many so I didn't see the need to turn on the dishwasher. So I'm standing there and I have no clue what came over me but there I stood singing Rawhide. Yep the lyrics are below. LOL I kind of laughed at myself and wondered if Dad was thinking about me. I remember when I was little and Dad would be walking around singing this song. I always smile when I think of this song because it reminds me yet again of my dad. I'll have to give him a call tomorrow morning.

The funnier thing about this was that my mom told us that dad would sing this song in his sleep. LOL She would be sound asleep and all of a sudden she said he yelled out RAWHIDE! LOL My poor mom. hehe



Rawhide
by Frankie Lane

Rollin', Rollin', Rollin',
Rollin', Rollin', Rollin',
Rollin', Rollin', Rollin',
Rollin', Rollin', Rollin',
Rawhide!
H'yah! H'yah!

Keep Rollin', Rollin', Rollin',
Though the streams are swollen,
Keep them dawgies rollin', Rawhide!
Through rain and wind and weather,
Hell bent for leather,
Wishing my girl was by my side,
All the things I'm missin'
Good fiddles, love and kissin',
Are waiting at the end of my ride.

Move 'em on, hit 'em up, hit 'em up, move 'em on
Move 'em on, hit 'em up, Rawhide
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, ride 'em im,
let 'em out, cut 'im out, Ride on in, Rawhide!
H'yah! H'yah!

Keep movin', movin', movin',
though they're disapproving,
Keep them dawgies rollin', Rawhide!
Don't try to understand them,
Just rope and throw and brand 'em,
Soon we'll be living high and wide!
My heart's calculating,
My true love will be waiting,
Be waiting at the end of my ride.

Move 'em on, hit 'em up, hit 'em up, move 'em on
Move 'em on, hit 'em up, Rawhide
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, ride 'em im,
let 'em out, cut 'im out, Ride on in, Rawhide!
H'yah! H'yah!
Rawhide!
H'yah! H'yah!
Rawhide!
Goodbye Ruby Tuesday


Well I've been spending today get rid of a virus on the office computers. It was all Michaels fault. I can't believe that he didn't download the virus scanner like I told him too. Of course sense we are all connected Tom's computer and then the one Danny was using picked it up today. The funny part is my computers are clean. Tom always blames me, at least this time he blamed Michael too. I got Tom's computer clean but Danny' is giving me a hard time. Let me tell you all now if you get a virus called padobot it is a pain in the ass to get rid of.

We downloaded a virus scanner for Michael and scanned his computer and there were several viruses he had. Then we did the spyware stuff. Adaware and Spybot. Both of those are really good. You need to run more than one spyware program thougth because they don't get everything. The first run through there was 232 spyware, then we ran the other one and it came up with 244. So It took about two passes with each one. So Michael is clean again. lol

I'm tired of this stuff though in my life. My dream last night was incredible. It spoke of, well having my foundation completely destroyed. So that finally came to the top of my consciousness. I feel rather drained now that I'm sitting still. Defeated... Not in a bad place though. More like I'm just accepting what has happened? Sam is laying here next to me offering some healing. Cats are so wonderful about that. I'm being loved by Sam. LOL He keeps butting my hand while I'm typing.

I feel strange. I'm not sure what to think about it. I still want to be mad but I also have a feeling of peace. I guess the fact like I said the dream seem to bring something forward I didn't want to face.

This dream was about tornados. (Imagine that) It got bad enough to where I had to grab the cats and call the dogs down to the basement. We were down there as the storm hit. I started noticing that the walls that were finished were no longer finished. There were holes like the sheet rock had been taken away. The cats went through these openings and I was afraid that they would be injured so I went through the door and when I opened it I saw a lot of destruction. Not a lot of clutter but there was a huge metal door that rolled up had been ripped off the house. All the windows were gone. Some of the siding was even gone. Where the walls were bare other than the 2x4's. The other wall was mostly gone but some of it still stood. I saw Marvin and Sam (cats) outside and I knew we were still in this storm and ran out to get them. I grabbed Marvin up and grabbed Sam by the tail so he wouldn't run and then scooped him up and went back inside. Then I woke.

At one point in this dream and I believe it was before the above part... I had been in the living room watching the trees swaying with the wind. There was this huge old pine tree that was swaying and I did my usual of talking to the trees asking them to be strong and not fall on the house. The trees started blwoing hard and this big old pine tree started not only swaying but going in circles. It broke and was still attached but going in circles. It brushed the house on each side of the living room. It didn't do very much damage though. So I thanked the tree for not causing more damage. I think that's when the other part of the dream came in.

So there was a lot in that dream.

Monday, September 27, 2004

Ok so I've had to have contact with the bastard cocksucker. He apologized several times. He says in his bullshit Scorpio tone. "I don't know what else I can do". Well, you could die for beginners. So as he was leaving he stopped and got the mail and brought it down to the house.

I forgot to mention I've been cutting ever piece of paper in the wastebasket into tiny iddy biddy shreds. He said will you feel better after you finish cuting me into shreds? I said probably not. So anyway back to the mail so I had "Whatever" by Godsmack literally blaring. I get the mail from him and he said "I said I was sorry". All I could choke out was "There is no recovery from this". I don't know what the look on his face was. I'm done. I am cutting the cord on the fullmoon and I'm chopping that fucker into with one blow.

You know I'm not sure the idiot that originally said that saying you're sorry would make things better. The person was a total fucking idiot. Sorry doesn't help, doesn't help the pain that was caused. Oh yes he seems to think it makes it better. This is a man who never apologizes so all of a sudden he thinks his apology means more? Fuck that.

You know right now I could do with a storm. I nice big thunder and lightening clashing storm. I know where I will direct some of that lightening. Some of that wind could do wonders in making me feel better. I hope it continues to rain after dark because I need to go out in it and dance.

And what bothers me even more is that I knew she was here. I felt it. He is such an insensitive bastard. This day started with promise.
GODDAMN MOTHERING FUCKING SON OF A BITCH!


So here I am having a pretty good day. Tom starts sending me emails which in itself isn't too bad because it was about business.

Then in one of these emails he forwarded was half about business and half about personal. He is the email.


"I told him I thought it was 1 day that you would research it. I couldn’t quote 1 for him but I recalled we used it during presidential details to remove anything left on the interstate.

The case in West Virginia settled today. Did you get closed on your house? Moving next week?

Call me tomorrow. Are you ever going to get back on that bike or just sell it? I know you’re busy.

On the Dallas front, she spent the week here. We had some good pillow talk and we left it at it looks like she will be moving here before long. Months or so I think. She thinks its too soon to do the engagement yet, but we are talking about it. She told me she loves me again and that she would love to live here. She even left some of her clothes here. Wooohooo.

Call me when you get a chance. "



What a mother fucking bastard. I wrote him back and told him not to send me anything else about Dallas. He said he didn't mean to. Then sent me another email and apologized profusely for what he sent. He cant fuck himself. I'm so goddamn pissed off right now I could do some serious damage. Goddamn him to hell.

Time to change?


"When coasting in our comfort zones, we don't grow. Wecontinue to do more of the same.... Maintaining acomfort zone can, paradoxically, lead to discomfort inthe long run. If by being comfortable we avoidimportant life issues, internal tensionaccumulates.... Eventually, as both internal andexternal pressures for change persist, the 'comfortzone' ceases to serve us." -- Eric Allenbaugh


It takes effort to change. What do you most want tochange in your life? Make a list of what you can do tostart the process. Try journaling, perhaps. Readbooks. Take a course. Find a mentor. Seek out support.How will you commit time to make it happen? When areyou going to start? Your life is passing quickly!"Be not afraid of changing slowly; be afraid only ofstanding still." -- Chinese Proverb



(C) Reproductions Permitted:
http://www.higherawareness.com/

Sunday, September 26, 2004

MY sister called today to give me the update on her Montana trip. She and Dale are still out there. She said they've been really having a really good time. They are exploring their new ranch and finding some cool stuff. She said those people are pretty weird out there. lol I had to laugh because it's not like my sister would stick out like a soar thumb or anything. If nothing else her clothes. lol

So she was talking about a little bit of everything and told me that Tom asked Matt to move in with him. Seems Tom is all of a sudden lonesome. How interesting... You leave what was your family and 3 cats and 3 dogs and the house is quiet? Wow! What a shocker that must have been. The thing that worries me is that Tom will kick Matt out again. I hope I'm wrong on that I really do. The other thing that came to my mind was I guess Tom is lonesome cause he has no one to order around. I know that sounds bad but it's true. He likes giving orders.

I hate thinking badly of Tom because he really can be such a good guy. It was like living with Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde. I never knew which one was going to be around.


I'm feeling lost tonight. Not sure about where I'm headed.
Know what I found out?

Those little cinnamon thingies I've been eating burned my tongue. lol Yep, the tip of my tongue hurts. It feels like your tongue does when you burn it on a hot drink or food thats too hot. *snort* Maybe I should have listened to being told to eating them. LOL

Ok, the black mirrors are finished and will be ready to ship out after the full moon. They came out good. Oh I know! I need to go and find some material and make a bag for them to go in. Hmm maybe even a scarf or something to just cover them if they want to leave them out.

I've gotten most of the house cleaned up today so that feels good. I need to vaccum and dust and then I'll be done.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

Well a relaxing Saturday night


I worked outside for a while today and then started resizing the pictures from my trip. I got most of them done and they brought smiles to my face looking at them. Then I sat here reading my emails and chatting with Branny. While I was talking to her someone I don't know and I've decided that it really annoys me when people can't be bothered to spell words out. I'm sorry but how fucking hard is it to type out "you" "For" "be"? Ok that's just a couple of examples. I think I'm putting in my profile that "if you can't take to the time to spell out your words then don't bother me".

Ok, so Branny went to bed after some ranting and saying that she should rejoin Kindly Ones. I had been thinking how nice it would be to fill that big ole tub up and just soak for a while. So I found some soothing music and filled the big ole tub up and crawled in. Ah yes... It felt great.. I got all nice and pruny too. lol I stayed in until the water started to become cool. lol

So it was nice just to have that time to sit in the tub and let myself relax and enjoy. It would have been nice to have someone that would enjoy the tub with me. No, it's not just about sex but the fact of enjoying relaxing with another person without the expectation of sex. If sex happens thats good if not then that's fine too. The point is to just relax. So I did and it was very much needed.

I had read something just recently that talk about about to stay awake in your sleeping body. I was rather skeptical but I believe it can be done. I tried it and everything happened just as the article I read said. If I hadn't been in the tub I would have been able to do it. I kept slipping in the tub because my body would go limp. Let me say when that happens I freak out. LOL I can tell you I want be trying it tonight when I go to bed because I know I'm going to be sleeping soundly. Probably quickly too.


This is hilarious! Be sure to read the warning at the bottom. I didn't change a word! I'm not messing with the Sex Fairy!

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.

6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

This message has been sent to you for good luck in sex. The original is in a room in the basement of the Dwight House Pub. It has been sent around the world nine times. Now sex has been sent to you. The "Hot Sex Fairy" will visit you within four days of receiving this message, provided you, in turn, send it on.

If you don't, then you will never receive good sex again for the rest of your life. You will eventually become celibate, and your genitals will rot and fall off. This is no joke! Send copies to people you think need sex (who doesn't?). Don't send money, as the fate of your genitals has no price.

Do not keep this message. This message must leave your e-mail in 96 hours. Please send ten copies and see what happens in four days. Since the copy must tour the world, you must send it. This is true, even if you are not superstitious.
Oh What a beautiful day!


Yep, the sunshine is wonderful this morning. It seems to be a little humid but not too bad. I went out to tackle the weeds again. Igot distracted and tried to look up a few of my weeds still no joy. I've got some really interesting plants but I have no idea what they are. Some bloom and some don't. My yard is being taken over by violets which I like. Such pretty little flowers. I did notice that butterfly bushes are popping up every where in my yard too. lol I love them and it seems obvious they love me too. *grins* There are baby bushes that are no where close to the adult plants. It's great though. I'll transplant them in other areas. This year I have had tons of butterflies so I'm cool with that.

I got the two black mirrors made that I wanted to make. I'll get them put together again later today. I need to make sure they are dry before I pack them up. These two are just in time to empower them in the full moon. So this is rather exciting. These two are the third and fourth ones I've made. I'd like to learn how to carved wood and make them more personalized. I'll have to think on this more.

I need to put on my boots and go check out the wood I'm gathering. Ok, I'm back outside to look at this wood.


Friday, September 24, 2004

An Exciting Friday Night!


I'm sitting here duly going through all the post that I need to answer nibbling on those little cinnamon thingies you put on cookie... My mouth is on fire.... A couple of times I've started coughing because they are so hot. I know I'm weird.

I'm watching X-Men 2... again... and I've decided that I like Magneto's powers. They are very cool. To be able to manipulate metal is pretty cool. Charles has a great power too but I don't know... Mind control.... Something seems more wrong about that than what Magneto can do. I'll admit that the others have some pretty cool powers too but well I don't know... I don't know I kind of like Storms powers too... Though we know how much I like storms and weather magick. *grins*

I'm guessing Michael had a tough day at school. He had dinner and has been sleeping ever since. lol

Oh wow that was one hot little cinnamon disk.... my mouth is on fire.... ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've got a couple of black mirrors to make tomorrow... Then go and gather some promised wood. I'll have to be sure and label what wood is what. I've got to upload some pictures tomorrow... Clean and do what little laundry there is to be done. I swear without Tom around the laundry is cut in at least half.

I need to shave my legs... they are driving me nuts. I always remember a little song out of a book. "They're wild and wolley and full of fleas and never have been curried below the knees." LOL It came from a book called Misty of Chincoteague by Marguerite Henry ISBN: 0689714920 . I loved that book when I was little. Ok I still love that book. I actually saw the movie last month. It was so funny and hokey cause it was made back in 1961. The year I was born. :-) Damn that's an old movie! *snicker* It was great though because it reminded me of a book that I loved and still have btw.

Oh now I'm sitting here watching "Dead Like Me" LOL That show really makes me giggle.

Ok, I think I may go do a serious blog... Not sure if I am or not though.. I may just wait until tomorrow to be serious.


Dream:


We were visiting some people in their houses. I felt like I didn't know these people but the people I was with did know them. We were sitting around in this one lady's kitchen talking, all of us. I don't remember what was happening but I know that I got the feeling that these two groups were into swinging, in a sexual way. It wasn't like something that was blantant but I just knew it. So we were sitting there all talking when, it seems like one of my boys came in and started getting him something to eat. The lady said oh no problem my boys are like that. So in comes her kids. They were all older like mine. So as we started outside the man and woman were standing next to me. I noticed that the man had made his driveway larger where they could turn around before pulling out onto to the road. I mentioned it and he said that he had done it that he worked in concrete. He tried to tell me something but there was too much noise. The more I looked at what he had done I noticed it looked more like huge cobble stones. I'm talking about 3 feet by 3 feet. It wasn't flat there was a dip in the middle. We started walking towards it and I saw that there was a cavern. He wife said something about him doing it. I could see stalagtites and stalagmites. The area didn't look safe to stand on because it looked thin. He told us where we could stand that was safe. So I looked in and there was like ruins in there. There was a cobbled stone walk way up to what seem to be an altar. The stones were all beautifully colored sort of metallic look to it. Nice and shiny but not like slick. I looked further and you could see where it looked like he had dug out a garage because I could see daylight. That was the way into this cavern.

Then we all went to something like a hotel. We had several rooms and the kids seem to be bunking together. I remember seeing my sister and she looked a little funny like she wasn't trusting them. Then she went in her room and get settled in. It seemed all the rooms were connected to this main area... I looked up and my sister was standing there naked. I was a little surprised but it seemed like this was acceptable. I was kidding with her holding up a towel on my side of this window. What was interesting was she had some beautiful tattoos on her lower body. I mean really pretty work. I then went to where her room was and it was like she was decorating her room like you would your tent at a festival you always go too. She had a sign that indicated her and her husband. She just had all kinds of things she was putting up. The front of her room was completely glass.


Just having some interesting dreams now.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Whats Love Got To Do With It?:


So I'm thinking about love. There are many things that run through my mind about it. Is it possible to love someone and be careful of your heart? Can you only give part of your love and hold the rest back? Should you? Should you even bother with love? Is it worth it? If it is then how do you know that it's real?

Yeah there I go again with all those question. I just don't know... Some days I wonder if I should even try...

I've thought about it quite a bit and I don't think I can ever only love someone with part of my heart. If I could then that would mean that I didn't truly love them the way I should.

Mabon Ritual:


Last night I did go out by the pond and do my ritual. I gathered ALL of the stuff I would need and told Michael I was going outside to do my ritual. Otherwise he'd come yelling for me, then 50 questions for which he wouldn't really care what the answer was. LOL

So I got everything set up... Had to fight with the cork on the wine... Oh no, it came out of the bottle ok but getting it off the corkscrew was another story! I did win that battle though. I did everything I needed to do including casting my circle. So I sat down and started my work. I asked for clarification on some stuff. Sent help to friends that had asked for it. It was interesting because I realized that when I did prayers and such I was getting an answer from the smoke as to whether they would be answered or not. I was sitting there with my eyes closed and the smoke was blowing away from me. When I asked for the first part of magick that I worked it immediately blew straight into my face. As I finished that the smoke changed directions immediately. Then with the next I got smoked again. It was interesting because there were degrees of how much smoke and whether it blew directly into my face or my chest or even a bit off to the left or right but still making contact with my body.

Something else I learned was that I am not suppose to use an athame to cast my circle. Not that it didn't work but it didn't feel right. So next time I'll give a wand a try.

So I took my black mirror into circle with me to cleanse and consecrate it. I sat it on the ground in front of where I was sitting after finishing the consecration. Out of no where a little candle fly appeared on my mirror. It was burnished gold color. I almost swatted it away before I realized what I was doing. I looked at it and thanked it for coming and went on with what I was doing. I had a spider that insisted on being there as I cast my circle. I'm not sure where it went afterwards.

I did have to laugh because there was a couple of times that the smoke smelled like a dirty armpit. I just giggled and kept going.

So that's what I did last night.

Last Nights Dreams:

I was at a farm with several people. I apparently was visiting yet the things that were happening around me were more like I was being tested. Tested to see if I would fit in. The farm is where this family lived. They had 3 kids and the husband and wife were really nice, as were the kids. Of course being a farm they had animals around. They took me to the field and introduced me to this man. He was very shy and he smiled and me and then looked down. He had a piece of hay in his mouth. He said he had to get back to work. So we left him to finish. The kids had taken me down to meet him. I came back up to the house and they all were excited and said we were going to play a game. I said ok. We were told to look across the road and write down everything that we saw. For some reason I didn't get there in time and they had moved on to looking at another thing. The same game. I was writing down everything that I saw in the living room. The table with 7 chairs (all mismatched), a map on the table, pencils and so forth. As I was writing I saw that I was recording my stuff on a piece of material using pencil. I was thinking to myself I'll never be able to see it. Then we all got talking and were sitting on the front porch with our feet hanging off, swinging them back and forth.. Just enjoying ourselves and the little girl was talking to me and said that the man in the field really liked me. The others were behind us and laughed lightly and started saying that he was really sweet but shy. I felt like I was there to meet him. They teased me a bit about it then the father started talking to me seriously. Which I don't remember much about other than he told me to go unlock the door. I walked into the kitchen (which was mine) and looked out the windows and saw their little brown and white dog digging in the freshly ploughed field. So I opened up a window and slipped out to go get the dog. The father was standing there and said why did you go out the window? I responded with I just wanted to climb out to see if I could climb back in. He looked at me kind of funny. The whole time though I was thinking because I forgot you said to unlock the door. Then I started thinking that all the doors were locked and I would have to climb back in the window to get inside. This man had a slight reddish tint to his hair and a beard.

Then the alarm went off and woke me...

******************************

Then I layed back down and drifted off. I remember just a little of this dream. I had gotten in this car with this man I had just met. We were going out. He had almost black hair and olive complexion. He and I were talking and he seemed pretty nice but he did something that scared me. He leaned towards me and his hand touched my neck and I had a flash of him strangling me. So sat there for a second like nothing was wrong and said we need to go back to the house because I forgot something. I knew if he would take me back to the house then with all the other people around I could get away from him. I think he did take me back to the house and I was making faces at everyone trying to tell them I was in trouble and needed their help. They all seem to like this guy and I was scare of him.

Then I woke up again....


Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Level4.jpg
Congratulations you have achieved level 4 witch
status... you have studied hard and learned
well!!

What Level of Witch are you
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Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Gotta to love emotions



Today has been mostly good. The past few days have been beautiful. However yesterday I felt like someone exploded a bomb in my head. During the night it finally was fixed. Thank you Trevor. I also have to say thank you to Anna and FtE, as they both sent energy too. I woke up several times during the night feeling like someone was inside my head with a pick axe. I quit looking at the clock. LOL

Alright so while I slept I had odd dreams. Last night I was camping somewhere and these people parked their bus next to where we were. The adults all left the bus to go get something to eat and left a little boy unattended. Turns out he was quite bratty so I know why they left him. LOL Anyway I went to check on him and he was a horrible child. I turned to walk away and he grabbed my pants and tried to pull them down. I remember rolling my eyes. I turned around and snatched him up by his arms. He was much smaller when I picked him up. I put my hand under his bottom as I carried him. I handed him to the adults and chewed them out about leaving him.

This was a very busy dream... I'm getting flashes but nothing concrete enough to type out. Again something about being chased.

Something I have found out about myself... or should say I realized. I'm very demanding of time of people I love. I'm a very consuming person. I remember that now, that's the way I am when I am in love. I guess because I was always there for the person I love I figure they should be there every second that I want them. You know when Tom and I first got married he made a comment about me being too attached. Hmmm... I thought that was part of loving. You know that was a turning point in the relationship for me. I knew then I could never give all of me. So I didn't. Then I was told no PDA. I'd like to shoot the dumbfuck that came up with that rule. So only another wedge in being affectionate.

Then I go to future thoughts. The thought of introducing someone new to my family. Funny when I was young that never bothered me. Maybe because I was never really looking at it like that. I mean, I'm replacing someone they've known for 24 years. All of a sudden I thinks it's important what they family thinks? Gods when did that happen?! I'm nervous at the thought of when that happens. The thing is I know they only want me to be happy. That's one good thing I can say about my family. They are supportive and they love me. *grins*


Sunday, September 19, 2004

Thinking


I was sitting here thinking about how every choice we makes affects us. Each choice makes us who we are. If we could go back and make changes, would we? How would affect who we are now?

Let's use this as an example. What if when I was 17 years old and not at the Gwinnett County firing range. That was the first place that Tom saw me and question folks as to who I was. What if a couple of weeks later he hadn't been at the Cobb County firing range. I wouldn't have seen and met him. Would I still have my two kids? How would I be different? Where would I be living? Would I have found my path earlier or would I have even found it?

Those are questions that can never be answered. I will never know who or what I may have been had those things not happened.

Ok, so I know what happened with the first part of my life. Now I have a new life starting. New choices to make. New places to start. So how do we know the choices we make are the best ones for us? What if we realize that we should make a huge change in our lives? How terrifying to even think about. Michael is 17 and a junior in high school. I can't think of moving now because I won't uproot him from the last two years of school. When he graduates would it be time to be me? Is now the time? When I say I'm lost this is what I'm talking about. All these unknowns to deal with. They scare me. They scare me because I always fall back to thinking but what if I screw it all up? What if I can't make it? Or is it that I fear I may make it?

It's like love. Taking a chance is difficult and how do you know for sure? I've never been real sure on what love really is. I mean I can love the folks on WG without a problem but a love as in partner love. That I've never been good at knowing. At seeing it or expressing it. Lots of questions... I know. Still no answers. Sometimes I fear that no matter what I do I will never be able to have it. It will always be just out of my grasp. If that is the case then is it my lesson in life to learn to be by myself? To learn to learn and grow on my own? To survive on my own? Is it about learning to take chances? To give love freely?

Can I ever be sure of the love? To be re-assured enough that it's true and not something that will fade in a few months? Could I ever be re-assured enough? I don't know. Maybe a lesson is to trust again.

I was thinking that you know I really have no desire to leave my house. It's not a fear of going any where. I just don't need to go anywhere or really I just don't want to go anywhere. I mean I loved my trip to the UK and I'm looking forward to Vegas but I just don't feel the need to go anywhere. I mean grocery shopping and such is one thing. I was thinking about people to hang out with... Well, my sister is in Montana for the Gods only know how long. There's Courtney but I feel like I would just be bothering her. Her life is pretty darn full. The others I just don't know well enough to just hang out with them. Plus hanging out with these people now when I didn't before smacks of using to me. So I can't really do that. I'm suppose to go to Border's Pagan's on Monday nights. I haven't felt like going the last 3 or 4 weeks. Don't feel like being that social. I don't know maybe I'm afraid of what may be there.

So here I sitting wondering and pondering my life. Where it goes for now I have no clue. I want to know who stole the repair manual though.


I woke up to see the sky an absolutely gorgeous blue and clear of clouds. The sun filtering through the trees caressing the leaves and gently kissing the ground. The birds chirping and jumping from branch to branch. Squirrels chattering at each other. A gentle breeze that teases your skin as the sun warms you.

Yes it's a beautiful day here. I little nip in the morning air... Makes a person frisky. It's one of the reasons I always loved this time of year. It gives you a feeling of excitement. Of moving to a next phase of life. Every year, the cycle of moving through the cycle of life. Yes this is a good time of year.

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Cleaning


Yep, today I cleaned the carpet in the living room. I moved all the furniture and vaccumed and then shampooed the carpet. I'm always amazed at how long it takes. Of course now my lower back is complaining about it. That's ok though it smells better and looks a lot better. I need to clean the carpets upstairs tomorrow but I'm not sure if I'm up to that. We'll see. I'm slowly taking back over the house.

Today I took all of Tom's porn movies and put them in trash bags so he could take them home with him. Plus the 5 drawers of work out clothes. Every time I find something else of his I either throw it in the front room or put it in a bag. He came by with Matt today and got the amoire that goes with the ugly bedroom suite he insisted we buy for the front room. He packed up all his crystal from the bar and all the liquor. As he carried out the crystal I heard it clinking... I wonder if any of it broke on during the trip?

You know those little jars that the candy sprinkles come in? Well I remembered that I had one and I filled it with catnip. The cats have been trying all day to get the catnip out. LOL They can smell it but can't get more than a few little peices out. Moving the furniture I found several toys the crazy cats lost. LOL They been playing nonstop with those also. So hopefully they will sleep good tonight instead of terrorizing the house all night long.

I'm having one of my what if times. Every doubt that I can think of. I really hate those cause they aren't very productive thoughts.

I've been thinking about when I should go back over to the UK. I'm ready of course I need to save up some money but that's another story. I did enjoy my trip and would go back in a heart beat. I would like to sit on top of the Tor and journey. Have one person there to help me to know when to return. I would like to return to Avebury also. I think I need to win the lottery so I can stay for as long as I want. lol

Ok so I should have titled this ramblings on a Saturday night. lol

Thursday, September 16, 2004

I was thinking on Roxanne's blog about the little boy who insulted Salem's beautiful purse.

Jo brought up that he like's Salem. That was my thought too but sheesh why don't people teach little boys how not to be so mean? lol It's funny cause when you think back you remember the immaturities of that age. Funny is that boys don't always out grow it. I know that when I was that age girls were immature also by the time we got to jr. high it was a little better yet now we had to put up with those cliques. This was the time when it wasn't one on one anymore but when several would gang up against one. They thought they were so smart, so superior. LOL Lets see then you have high school which is a time of staying strictly within your own little group. I finally got roots in the 5th grade. We stayed in one placed. I graduated with the people I'd known since then. Friendships that I had in 5th grade changed. The guys changed. I stayed friends with the ones I was friends with. The only girl that I stayed friends with all this time wound up being my sister in law. lol Susan is my sister in law. I remember that during our freshman year in high school a new girl moved into Susan's hood. Her name was Carla. She was such a twat. I refused to be around her. She treated everyone, including Susan, like they were inferior to her. lol She didn't wind up with any friends, not real friends anyway. Of course the group she started hanging out with were all two faced. I use to get the biggest kick watching them. They thought they were so important. I can say I'm glad I had my horse Sassy. She made me see how insignificant relationships with people who weren't true to each other. She kept me from worrying about guys. LOL Even at that point of time guys were immature in how they approached girls. I think one of the funniest things was that I had made friends with one of the most sought after football (american that is) players, that was a Senior. We used to have a great time talking about cars and it killed the other girls. I never understood it cause he had a girlfriend and I wasn't interested in him in anything other than friend. LOL

Then the 5 year reunion... The guys were still immature and approaching the girls like they were still little boys. LOL I just had to laugh.

Oh and I saw some of the girls I went to high school with back about 17 years ago... They tried their little high school act with me. Let's just say that they were a little shocked that I stood against them. The thing was my sister had known one of them for a couple of years before she found out that I had gone to school with her. LOL My sister took me over there thinking that we were friends which apparently the girl told her. The problem was when my sister saw the reaction it pissed her right off too. My sister apologized for taking me over there. I said don't worry about it. That ended her friendship with that girl. haha

I guess all in all not everyone matures.
A Great Lesson

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all of their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died. The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

This story teaches two lessons:

1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day.

2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them. Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path. The power of words....it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way. Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times. Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another. Be Special to others.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

I took it twice because there were multiple answers. LOL


Take the quiz: "Which Random Irish Gaelic Phrase Are You? "

Go n-eithe na peisteoga thu
Go n-eithe na peisteoga thu - 'May the worms eat you.'You're one sick bastard. When you die, you're going to to a very warm place. That is, if you don't already run it.
Take the quiz: "Which Random Irish Gaelic Phrase Are You? "

Is maith liom bananai
Is maith liom bananai - 'I like bananas.'You're laid-back and you enjoy the simple things in life. Some might say you're a little too laid-back. Just what is it you're smoking, anyway?
Drifting


I had one of those inbetween days yesterday. My horoscope was rather funny and two thirds of the way through my day it became true. Ok, let me find it so you can see.

Here it is:
A dramatic eruption is due, and you could be playing the part of the volcano. If you're ready to blow and need to vent, excuse yourself. Not a word until you're alone.

That's the way the day went. I wasn't angry until later in the day and I found that the most stupid of things could set me off. I got an email off another list that just hit me as stupid. Sitting here I realized I was talking to my computer telling it how stupid it was. Ok, so I felt a little strange when I realized I was doing this. Not only that but then I felt bad about talk to the email like that.

Tom came by and picked up more stuff. I swear there is no end to him asking for more stuff. He isn't getting anything else. If he wants knick knacks he can go buy them. Especially since he raised hell every time I wanted one. It really annoys me. I shouldn't let it really it only possessions and that seems so important to him.

I got today's horoscope and it sounds much better. Here it is:
You pick up on subtle clues the rest of the world would never have seen. Don't gloat, and try not to be too smug -- but do make sure the powers that be see how efficiently you've handled this.

LOL Don't gloat... *giggle* too smug! LMAO Nah not today.... I'm feeling rather laid back today. There is a nip in the air this morning. It's a gorgeous day out. I don't know but there is a feeling of expectancy. I'm not sure what it's about. It feels great though. I went out to feed the fish and was thinking a cuppa would be good. Did I get one? No, I took my bottle of water and wandered over to the office. I've got more scanning to get done. I was just bored of looking at a crashed motorcycle. Doesn't have that much damage but I think laying a bike down probably isn't the most fun thing to do. Back to the fish, they were starving as usual. LOL You'd think they never eat. When someone comes up to the house they always comment on how they felt like the fish were going to attack them. Then they laugh. It is kind of funny seeing them rushing towards you begging to be fed. All these mouths out of the water doing the fish face at you. Diablo is one of my favorites. He has begging down to an art. He swims by slowly and then comes back stopping right in front of me waiting. So I drop food in for him and and gracefully eats it. He stays in the same place and waits for more. LOL He is a very relaxed fish. The others can be swimming around fast and Diablo just swims slowly. :-) Oh if you are wondering about his name... He is a black and white fish and I named him after the Cisco Kids horse. LOL Yeah I know... I'm weird.

Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with
SmilingMoon's Lurgy
Cause:mobile phone radiation
Symptoms:flushing, déjà vu, excessive hunger
Cure:expensive biofeedback devices
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:





Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with
Georgia osis
Cause:influence of the Devil
Symptoms:metallic skin, winking, excessive hallucinations, shivering
Cure:don't do it again
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:




Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with
Wixaosis
Cause:thinking too hard
Symptoms:mild jaw dislocation, constipation, extremely cockney accent
Cure:electroshock therapy
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:

Sunday, September 12, 2004

Sunday Sundae


I've been out playing a bit in my yard. A storage closet I have was so trashed. Everytime I would clean it out Tom and the boys would trash it. So two years ago I told them that if they did it again I wouldn't clean it again. Well they did in less than 4 days you couldn't walk in there so I refused to clean it again. Now that Tom is gone and Matt is off on his own I decided I'd clean it again. Can I say yuck! It was really terrible in there. There was so much dog hair and dirt and stuff. At least now you can walk in there and the vacum cleaner and carpet cleaner can be found. lol

I need to go back outside and start pulling weeds. lol There are tons of weeds...

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Sitting here watching the movie The Missing. I heard this strange noise and look up and here comes Marvin pulling himself around the ottoman being silly. LOL I love the way cats play. LOL Now he is flipping around on the floor. Obviously his brother Sam is too lazy to come play with him. LOL

The dogs are staying away from the edge of the sofa so they won't get attacked either. LOL Marvin has a thing for Joey. He will chase Joey around. Sneaks up on Joey when he is sleeping and then start licking him between the eyes. *snicker* Joey really really hates that. Then Marvin starts sniffing Joey's toes. Freaks him out. Joey starts growling and Marvin ignores him and keeps up his annoying behavior. Marvin will lay down next to Joey just to annoy him. Finally Joey can't take it anymore and gets up and leaves. lol He bothers Curly too. When he does that Curly will chase him and that's just what he wants. LOL It's funny to watch them together.

I tried to take that nap I spoke of earlier but it just wasn't going to happen. It was like everyone knew I wanted a nap. So I suffered through and stayed awake... barely.

Nag Champa... *sighs* It smells so good.
Ah Thursday...


It's been an absolutely gorgeous day today. I had to go get the tag for my car and since it was the year for a tag change I got the spay and neuter tag. Last time I had the Wildlife tag. So my car is legal again. Should have gotten it before my trip but couldn't be bothered about that.

I stopped by my favorite local witch store and bought a money candle, which I will be using when folks ask for a boost of money energy. A book a reading coffee grounds. My grandmother use to do that and my dad was telling us about it the other day. So I'm going to try and pick that up. Then I purchased a deck of Gypsy Fortune telling cards. They are similar to a regular deck but somewhat different. Nag Champa... I love nag champa... It's my very most favorite incense. I got a very big box of it. lol

Anyway so I sat down to test the cards out. I'm not sure what to think of them yet. The first reading was mine. Hey, good news is someone loves me. lol The bad news is the road could be bumpy for a bit for me. I guess that's all right. In the end things looked good. Then I thought ah the birthday girl.... So I practiced on her. I got sleepy and haven't finished the reading. I'll just have to do it all again. Cause I really need to take a nap now.

Nap time. Later dudes.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Samhain plans


Yeah I know... but I was sitting here re-reading Priestess and I realized that the blisters that I got while in Glastonbury were pealing. I know yucky but it's given me an idea. We've all been moving on since what happened there and I decided that I will use this skin to move further from the pain, anger and marid of other negative emotions that happened. I don't want to go through life with that always niggling at me.

See I figure that since the blisters where caused while hurridly trying to get to the Chalice Wells. I must admit I think they would have been worse if I hadn't soaked them in the water. :-) So not only is the skin representing the pain but well, the water was involved in healing. Sounds like a good thing to me.

I'll just have to figure exactly what and how I want to do.

Rambling thoughts for the day... for now anyway.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Aww today was a good day.


I spent about $300. of Tom's money for him. It was stuff for him but still I had fun. Got my flight to Vegas finally. So I'll be going out there in October.. I really can't wait. It will be great getting to meet all those folks too. How exciting... My first Wiccaning... :-D AND it being William... I'm just thrilled.

It's been raining since last night, well really like two days. The ground is so saturated. We've lost a couple of trees. Two were dead anyway. One was a very healthy oak. :-( Now there is a huge hole in the ground to boot!

Well, it's been a laid back day. I'm tired and should go to bed while I can still walk.

Monday, September 06, 2004

Just another day in Paradise


Not really but who's counting? It started out pretty good actually. I was relaxed and enjoying life. I layed in bed and read emails from last night and chatted a bit. Then Matt (my oldest called) and said he dad came back in town last night instead of tonight. Told me the reason not that I gave a shit about it. So I decided I would clean my closet that looks like a bomb went off in it. Then Tom showed up to get some stuff. So I sent Michael to help him. Then I went down to show him which sofa table he couldn't take like he asked. He acted shitty, so I went back up stairs. Then I came back down to get my pillows that I let him use on that furniture. The pillows go with the furniture that I'm keeping . He pitched a fit about it. He said what are you doing and I said taking my stuff. He said they were on the furniture I said yes I let you use them. Well it turn in to a fuck you fight. I told him to get the fuck out. I knew that'd piss him off. So Michael helped him load everything. Oh and he thought he was going to take my blankets I left down there. NOT! I took all his stuff out of his closet and threw it in the front room for him. He can pack it himself. Dick head. I'll be glad when he gets the hell out completely.

Now I got that off my chest.

So I went shopping at Garden Ridge. A home decorating store. I think they are over priced but they've got some cool stuff. I bought Michael a new comforter set for his bed and one for my new bed. New pillows for us both. I feel a bit better.

Sunday, September 05, 2004

Changes they are a coming...

My emotions are all over the place again. On a roller coaster again. Nothing bad at all. It's just weird that I'm up then I'm a little down and that's in a manner of seconds. LOL I think it's just me being a Cancer to tell the truth.

Usually when my emotions really get like this changes happen. This is a time for growth, just another move up.

Things are going good for me. I'm happy, I can't wait for Tom to be done moving so I can start painting the house. THAT is going to be one hell of a project. My living room has ceilings 22 feet tall. So that should be a real fun thing. I can't wait.

Today we are going to my sister's to celebrate all the Virgos birthdays. Then my sis and her husband are going back out to Montana again. I'm not sure how long they will be there this time.
I know that a lot of people on WG would like to increase their abundance and prosperity into their lives. So I found this and thought I'd share it.



Making An Abundance Altar

Vastu Altars To Increase Abundance & Prosperity

1) Make sure the area is clean and your surface is
against a northern wall or window, or in the north
sector of your home or office.

2) The colors gold and green should be used on some
pieces on this altar.

3) The water element in the northeast can be fresh
flowers in colors that correspond to the altar. You
can use a vase that is clear or lightly colored.

4) Use a green or gold candle in the southeast, or an
oil lamp.

5) Use stones or crystals in the southwest in green or
gold colors. You can use a statue of Lakshmi, the
goddess of abundance, a plant, or anything from
nature.

6) For the air element in the northwest, use a
standing wind chime, incense, a fan or a feather.

7) You can hang a green colored Austrian leaded
crystal on a red string in increments of nine inches
over the center of your altar to keep the abundance
you desire moving in your direction.

8) Add a dish or small plate in the center of your
altar to act as a place for your offering. Use gold or
green.

9) You can add a Shree Lakshmi Yantra to your offering
dish for an extra boost of positive energy or a
Ganapati (Ganesh) Yantra to remove all obstacles to
your abundance.

10) On an unlined piece of paper that can easily fit
onto the Offering Tray, add a handwritten word, an
Angel Card, or some other symbolic representation of
the abundant feeling you would like to receive from
the Divine.

11) Include a Personal Symbol in the center, in back
of the offering tray of your altar. It can be a
statue, photograph, collage, or picture that inspires
feelings of abundance.

This is reprinted from Altars of Power and Grace:
Create the Life You Desire by Robin and Michael
Mastro.
PLANET ALERT September 2004 By Mahala

On July 26, 2004 we entered into the year of 'The Storm' in the Mayan Dreamspell calendar. Shortly after entering the storm year, the hurricane Charley blew into Cuba and Florida. Rain, storms, and flooding will continue throughout this year.

It's interesting how Astrology works. At the time Charley blew in, the planet Saturn was in the sign of Cancer on 21 degrees. This transposes to 70 degrees west longitude which runs down the East Coast of the USA. The moon was also in Cancer. On a world map, Cancer rules the area from the Mississippi River to the East Coast, or from 60 to 90 degrees west Longitude.

Venus was at 19 N declination (latitude) and Saturn was at 21 N declination. The moon was on 27 N declination on August 12, which is also the closest point to the northern hemisphere. On August 14, Charley blew into Florida. Look on a world map and see where the longitude and latitude lines cross. This is where the hurricane blew in. Maybe some scientist out there would like to take a look at how the moon and planets affect our Earth.

Some scientists are finally recognizing Astrology as a science. There was an article on the front page of the Seattle Times on Saturday August 21, 2004 entitled Doctors might soon ask, "What's your sign?" Your birth month is linked to certain diseases. It's a very interesting article.

There are other scientists like Bruce Lipton, Ph.D., cell biologist, and Maurice Cotterell, international acclaimed writer and engineer, who have also proven that Astrology works.

I believe Astrology is God's law in action. Before we came to Earth, we decided who our parents would be and when we wanted to be born. This set up a road map for us to follow. We can either follow that road map or not. This is where free will comes in. An example of destiny is the fact that George Bush's node is on 19 degrees Gemini, conjunct Mars in the USA chart. This shows that he chose to be a war president.

Incidentally, both George Bush and John Kerry are going to be hard hit by the planetary aspects this month. John Kerry's Sun is on 18 degrees Sagittarius and that is where Pluto has been hanging out for a long time.

Pluto rules transformation and power. I don't think the Republican Convention will go as planned because the Sun is opposing Uranus. This can cause unexpected events. (This worked out as thousands of people demonstrating in New York against Bush).

Just before the new moon in September, we find the Sun conjunction Mars on 19 degrees Virgo. This makes a 90 degree angle to Pluto, and affects the charts of both Kerry and Bush, and the USA. Mercury and Jupiter are also in Virgo. This is a very intense planetary aspect, so keep your cool. Mars rules fires, fighting, violence, terrorist action, wars, and volcanic eruptions.

Other interesting events transpired in August.

I have learned from experience that whenever a 'Star Gate' opens, it manifests on Earth by either an earthquake, wind storm, or possibly a volcanic eruption. A Sirian Star Gate opened on August 8, 2004. This affected the whole East Coast, and caused Charley to blow in a few days later.

Sirius corresponds with 13-14 degrees Cancer, and directly affects Washington, D.C. Venus was affecting Florida on 19 N latitude and Washington, D.C. on double that latitude which corresponds to 38 N latitude. Both areas were, and will continue to be affected by that Star Gate opening.

Sirius is a sixth dimension star. This is the level of Christ consciousness or the golden frequency. Because this energy was right over Washington, D.C. when the Star Gate opened, it means to me that we are in for a big change in our government.

I said in my last article that President Bush was given a time period of 1,290 days to rule everyone, and after that, his downfall would start to happen. This date corresponded to June 24, 2004. It also says in the same paragraph that blessed are the ones who come to the end of 1,335 days. If you count from the time the Supreme Court made the decision that Bush would be president, which was December 12, 2000, the end of that date was August 8, 2004. This means that Bush can no longer rule light workers, because we now vibrate to a different frequency.

Something good is bound to happen that will change our future because the Star Gate opened on that day, and Christ energy poured into Washington, D.C. from the star Sirius. Sometimes when a positive energy comes in so strong, it appears to manifest on a negative level to begin with because so many people can not handle the energy. This energy will not only affect Washington, D.C., it will affect the whole world; look what it did to Florida. Watch what happens in September because of the intense planetary energy in effect at that time.

It is now time for light workers to start receiving some rewards for their hard work. It has been a long hard battle, which is now over. As of August 15, 2004, the dark ones are no longer able to interfere with light workers. Isn't that great? It will be full speed ahead for us after the September 14th new moon in Virgo, the Virgin. It's now time to do our work on a larger scale. The opening of the Sirian Star Gate changed everything.

People have now made their choices whether they want to live on a higher, or lower level Earth. This will be expressed in the upcoming presidential election. We will be able to see if the people in the USA again choose a war leader. As the USA goes, so goes the rest of the world.

This is the time when the dark side will start to destroy itself. This is talked about in the 20th chapter of Revelations. Events may get very dark on the lower level Earth. I think this time period will last until September of 2007. We, anyone, can now start living in the new vibration which is safe energy. It's simply a matter of living a joyful, happy, life with a loving attitude.

IT IS NOW TIME TO CONNECT TO GODDESS ENERGY.

The Earth and our solar system revolve around the central Sun Alcyone in the Pleiadian constellation. Alcyone is a seventh dimension star. The Pleiadian system represents the seven stars before the throne in Orion.

Remember, we have to go through the Star Gate in Orion ( Saint Peter's

pearly gate) to see the throne of light. The Mayans say their ruler lives in a pyramid house in the sky in the Orion constellation. This is considered the throne of light in our galaxy.

Some people say that negative beings came from Orion. This is true; the negative ones were kicked out of heaven (Orion) after the great war was over. Some came to Earth to stir up wars and to control us. They are on Earth right now and they are the controllers.

The Mayans say that our Earth is the eighth star in the Pleiadian system. The seven stars in that system represent seven dimensions, our chakra system, the seven trumpets in the Bible, and the seven hills that Seattle was built on. The Pacific Northwest is directly aligned with Alcyone, the Central Sun.

On April 27, 2004 a Star Gate opened in the Pacific Northwest to seventh dimension energy. I originally thought it was sixth dimension energy. I was wrong. This Star Gate opened with a tremendous wind storm, and lightening on the West Coast. After that opening, we had lots of storms and lightening, particularly around the summer solstice. Once a Star Gate is open, it affects the whole world.

The Pleiadian system represents Goddess energy. Now everyone has the opportunity to open to the seventh dimension. This gives us the opportunity to connect all seven chakras to our heart. This will bring in our new immune system and this is when we will become healthy. This is also why those who connect and work through their heart energy will not be hurt as the world goes through the rest of her tribulation.

The goddess energy is an iridescent silvery crystalline energy ruled by the Platinum Ray. Platinum has a higher frequency than gold, and is much more expensive than other metals. This silver ray is a very beautiful energy. I saw it several years ago as a silver light (almost white) with all different colored sparkles in it. You might want to meditate on this ray coming into your body and connecting with your seven chakras and your heart.

In the beginning there was the gold and silver ray. Out of the silver ray came the other colors and all of creation. In other words, the goddess energy is the creator ray. It's time to connect to this beautiful ray that is held deep within your emotional body, or heart chakra. This ray will expand the flame in your heart so you can live on a fifth dimension Earth, manifesting the love of the seventh level goddess ray.

On March 23, 1993 all of the black holes in our galaxy opened to a new frequency. This energy was on one frequency not two. This is when the oneness energy first showed up on Earth. In December of 1993, there was a

5.2 earthquake in Egypt. This opened the acupuncture points of the pyramid so this new energy could travel around the world to all of the sacred sites.

Then in July of 1999, the Earth opened her vortexes to accept feminine energy. Many vortexes opened to the triple circular pattern of the magnetic flow of goddess energy. Then on August 11, 1999, there was a total solar eclipse with a cross in the heavens on the degree of Christ Consciousness. We have been in the process of clearing ourselves of negative thoughts and feelings since 1993.

The goddess energy is loving, watery, and emotional. The Earth is expressing this by all of the water events that are now happening on Earth. The ice at the North Pole has melted. There is hardly any ice left there anymore. In the Antarctic, two ice shelves have broken away and slipped off into the ocean. The third one has started to crack and when that breaks off and falls into the ocean, the level of the ocean will rise and flood all coastal lowlands. We are in the great tribulation.

It's happening right now.

Don't get caught up in fear. Love is letting go of fear. You can now live in safe energy because you are protected. So Be It! I send you my blessings!

***** Mahala *****

I can be reached at Mahala2@webtv.net or www.alcseattle.com


Friday, September 03, 2004

I change one answer and came up with this.


Silver Dragon
You are a silver dragon. The rarest kind of dragon.
YOu are noble yet avoid humans as much as
possible. You are the guardian of the
defensless and you rule the skies.


Which Dragon resides in your soul? (cool pictures!)
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Green Dragon
You are a green dragon. YOu dwell in the forest and
you love peace. You don't often bother yourself
with human affairs but you love to help when
needed.


Which Dragon resides in your soul? (cool pictures!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

I'm sitting here listening to the thunder. I love that sound. Now it's pouring rain... I love it!