Musing

Last nights dream again involved horses.

Very odd, searching dream. I can see glimpses of it since I woke. I remember walking a road with several other people. I just can't remember where we were going.

I had wrote to Mab the other day that even when someone had hurt me I still am there if they need help. I would like to think of it as a weakness but in truth, it's not. It's not that I forgive the person/s, it's that if they are in need then I can over look the hurt. This doesn't mean I would go and do physical labor for them. lol It means I will and do still support them when they need that kind of help. I've tried not to but it goes against me somehow. Against something that is bigger than ego could ever be.

I'm tired, tired of feeling like I need to worry about stuff. Tom told me he and Dallas were fueding again. I think he expected me to ask about it. He isn't in a place where he needs me to listen, when he gets there I'm sure I'll break down and do so.

This year will be better. I want something that I don't know can ever happen. It may even be that it is not something I can ever have. I'll see as time goes by.