Sometimes I'm just computer illiterate... Today is one of those days. I was trying to install a DVD burner which in itself was easy but now I can't make it work. It seems to keep telling me the disc are wrong. It's something I was doing for Tom so he can figure it out.
BUT as I sat there letting the software load I looked out the office window and there was a pretty sight. The sun was hitting the tops of the trees. They had sort of a reddish glow... Everything looked so clear and crisp... So I sat and looked at that for a bit. It was pretty nice and helped me relax a bit.
I went out and pulled more weeds today. It was a bit therapeutic... Since I used that as ripping out some of my frustrating about not having control over the situation. I guess I shouldn't really let it get to me but I really hate giving up that much control. Some people like to turn over their lives to the control of the *God/dess*... I really like having a hand in it. I know there are some things beyond my control but it doesn't make me feel any better about it.
I just think that not having any say in the matter just feels wrong. Maybe we are given so many choices. Let's say we are given 6 (arbitrary number) paths to chose from. So we do have some say in our lives. It's up to us to chose what is going to be best. Maybe we don't always do that and maybe that's the point. It could be that we are learning lessons with each path we can chose. What am I learning from this divorce... hmmm... well... I'm not sure. I think that maybe it's nothing more than we've out grown each other. Or hopefully it is me who has out grown him. LOL That would make me feel a bit better. *grins*
Tom and I talk about conversations we have with the boys. He keeps mentioning that when he talks to Matt that he tells him that we just wanted different things. I have to think on that because the only difference I was aware of was spiritual and he isn't even spiritual! Then he continues and tells Matt that he couldn't change me. This is a recurring thing that he says. Also that he doesn't agree with my path. I'm not sure how he can't considering he knows nothing of it. He never asked questions, he never showed any interest in what it was about. So I'm not sure how he can say he doesn't agree when he doesn't know. I think the point is it scared him and that's as far as he could get.
BUT as I sat there letting the software load I looked out the office window and there was a pretty sight. The sun was hitting the tops of the trees. They had sort of a reddish glow... Everything looked so clear and crisp... So I sat and looked at that for a bit. It was pretty nice and helped me relax a bit.
I went out and pulled more weeds today. It was a bit therapeutic... Since I used that as ripping out some of my frustrating about not having control over the situation. I guess I shouldn't really let it get to me but I really hate giving up that much control. Some people like to turn over their lives to the control of the *God/dess*... I really like having a hand in it. I know there are some things beyond my control but it doesn't make me feel any better about it.
I just think that not having any say in the matter just feels wrong. Maybe we are given so many choices. Let's say we are given 6 (arbitrary number) paths to chose from. So we do have some say in our lives. It's up to us to chose what is going to be best. Maybe we don't always do that and maybe that's the point. It could be that we are learning lessons with each path we can chose. What am I learning from this divorce... hmmm... well... I'm not sure. I think that maybe it's nothing more than we've out grown each other. Or hopefully it is me who has out grown him. LOL That would make me feel a bit better. *grins*
Tom and I talk about conversations we have with the boys. He keeps mentioning that when he talks to Matt that he tells him that we just wanted different things. I have to think on that because the only difference I was aware of was spiritual and he isn't even spiritual! Then he continues and tells Matt that he couldn't change me. This is a recurring thing that he says. Also that he doesn't agree with my path. I'm not sure how he can't considering he knows nothing of it. He never asked questions, he never showed any interest in what it was about. So I'm not sure how he can say he doesn't agree when he doesn't know. I think the point is it scared him and that's as far as he could get.
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