IT'S ABOUT GRIEVING eight important stages

I got this from a list and it just haves good information in it.


IT'S ABOUT GRIEVING eight important stages

Many years ago I was privileged to participate at a conference on
alternative healing at the University of Arizona in Tucson.

The two featured speakers were Andrew Weil, MD and Dr. Elisabeth
Kubler-Ross. A handful of us were asked to lead discussion groups
after the main speakers. Group leaders and the main speakers met
both before and afterwards to appraise the conference. I came away
with an enormous respect for both Andy Weil and Dr. Kubler-Ross.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's work on death and dying is still the major
work in that field. In the field of grieving; counselors of all
sizes shapes and background use the sages of grieving as put forth by
Elisabeth. Some people use a five stage outline. As I became
thoroughly indoctrinated by the master, herself, I prefer her full 8
stage program.

It is worth repeating in full. Even in full it is short. I
encourage you to print it out to save for future reference. Grieving
comes not just at the death of a loved one or friend. Loss comes in
many forms.

I have been grieving not only for a bitterly lost election, but more
important, to me, a grieving for an America remarkably removed from
an international code of morality and functioning that has us
despised, feared and alienated from the rest of the planet. The
arrogance of America's new aloneness in the world community does,
indeed, have me grieving.

The Eight Stages of GRIEF & LOSS Courtesy of Elisabeth Kubler-
Ross

NUMBNESS and SHOCK
The body's natural defense system insulates us in the initial stages
of a threatening situation. We may run on "automatic pilot", and
later not even remember what happened when we first encountered the
bad news or loss.

DENIAL
We may experience disbelief. "That this is not possible . there must
be some mistake . you must have the wrong person, the wrong medical
records . that can't be true ."

PAIN and ANGUISH
As the truth sinks in, as the numbness fades, we may feel deep pain,
stomach cramps, feel like we can't breathe, like our heart is
breaking, a raw knot in the center of our being, a sense that we will
die or never be whole again.

ANGER
We may get angry at the messenger who delivers the news, the doctor,
the person who caused us this pain (even if that person is now
deceased), at anyone we can hold responsible for our grief, even at
God.

BARGAINING
We may try to negotiate the situation, either with another person
involved, or with God: "Please give me one more chance and I promise
things will be better . I will change . if you will reverse this,
then, I will _______________ in return".

DEPRESSION
When we realize the loss is real and unchanging, we may sink into a
deep sorrow. We may feel guilt, remorse or regret. Whether or not
we have a terminal illness, we may feel our life is over. Some may
consider or attempt ending their lives.

ACCEPTANCE
If we can come to terms with the reality of the situation, recognize
it as a now fact of our lives, and gradually let go of the struggle
against the tide, we can move beyond our suffering and find peace
within ourselves, even with our new circumstances.

HOPE FOR THE FUTURE
Acceptance of the reality of current circumstances can lead to a
renewed hope for a future, even though different from the one we used
to imagine. Even those facing a terminal illness can call upon
spiritual beliefs about the future, or help loved ones accept their
futures without us.

Some of the wording and punctuation is fragmented and unusual. This
is copied directly from Dr. Kubler-Ross. Her Swiss upbringing and
education is apparent.